sunshine of the dark

[rocfreaks]

Hellos to all the bros and sis.

This is 1 out of the 3 pictures which i will upload for the next 3 weeks.

Basically, i want your comments and critiques.

First i would like to start off with the title. I want your honest opinion on the title, whether its appropiate or not.

Second, is the texture, tone and colour is alright? I find them, to be acceptable... So i want to know whether this is okay for others.

i know that the picture is a common perspective... but i want to relay a message to my girlfriend. Even though when times are bad, even though there's darkness everywhere, both of us are will shine to one another, lending each other the strength to move on. And basically these sunflowers signifies our strength for one another... I hope this ain't heavy for you guys. sorry for the emotional rush.

taken from Hort park, singapore
exposure = 1/200 secs
aperture = f5.6
iso = 100
with flash.

Thank you and have a nice day

 

[tkbonz]

Not sure if its just my monitor, but the "sunshine" / brilliance effect is not brought out as the flowers' exposure seemed a little low.

Another major thing i took note was that most of the sunflowers are in the foreground of the picture, an effect brought about by the branches being situated higher than the flowers. So the idea of being the sunshine of the dark seemed a bit lost as the flowers looks like its going downwards...

I can tell from your composition that you're trying to fit the flowers nicely within the frame but somehow it doesn't work for me as due to the arrangement of the flowers (stems above flowers)

 

[foxtwo]

The arrangement is unconventional but acceptable, for me anyways. Lighting fails though, use off-shoe flash or cont. lights, both diffused. You should seriously consider shooting this indoors in a controlled setting. You'll also be able to trim the flowers and stems to your liking, I find there's too many flowers above to suit your needs. And is 'yellow' the choice? How about another or different colours, etc? Does using sunflowers have any other meaning other than your title? Maybe use a flower she likes instead? It's a personal message you're conveying, consider a more 'romantic' theme like just having two red roses or something. It's a big cliche but I think anyone would take to it faster.

However, I don't know what adversities the two of you have faced or are facing etc, real-life is often much different from fantasy. So whatever remarks we make about composition or flower arrangement is probably not a reflection on your lives. Balance artistic and realism while keeping it simple. I would think your gf wouldn't expect masterpieces but just an effective representation of the love and bond between the two of you. Craft the photo to her and your needs firstly, whatever we say here is only being artistic.

 

[Stoned]

I think the concept is there but there's quite a few areas that I think needs to be touched up to achieve what you want with greater clarity.

Firstly, I would prefer the image to be rotated 180 deg, as tkbonz has mentioned, it looks awkward in this position. Since that is not the intention, to upset the viewer, I would recommend rotating the image.

Secondly, as foxtwo has mentioned, the picture is currently a little cluttered with too many flowers. Decisive trimming of several stalks here and there(esp. the ones with defects) would strengthen the visual impact.

Lastly, I find the stalks of grass/leaves in the background rather annoying, especially where the areas of negative space ought to be, such as in the top left hand corner or in the bottom right third of the image. To eliminate this, position your light sources about 45 deg to both the right and left of the subject, this will minimise the light fall on the background. Of course this will depend on the location as well since it's outdoors. Roughly though, a set-up like that ought to work.

 

[flashbug]

composition could be better and perhaps you can further isolate the flowers?
you mentioned that it is to relay a message to your girlfriend right?
Then perhaps having 2 instead of so many flowers can better convey the message, because all i see now is a rather big bunch of flowers shrouded in darkness.