Time for my own little modifications:
1) You will always be changing film when the best shot of the day happens.
Or, in this day and age, you will always be reviewing your last great sequence on your 5 million dollar digital whizz bang when the best shot of the day happens.
2) The battery pack in the camera will always go flat at the wrong time.
To be honest, never had it happen, but then I always change at the "halfway" point.
Or, in this day and age, the buffer in the camera will always go full at the wrong time.
3) The battery pack locking system gremlin will always strike when you need to change battery packs quickly, thus taking 2 mintues to perform a 10 second task.
Or, in this day and age, the tried and tested finger system will always drop the fiddly compact flash card when you need to change cards quickly, thus taking 2 minutes to perform a 10 second task,
and then giving eternal grief that you've misplaced the first CF card somewhere.
4) CF to laptop transfer times are inversely proportional to the urgency of the photographers requirements to obtain a blank CF card.
Or, as only seems to happen to me, data network bandwidth is always inversely proportional to the urgency of the photographer's requirements to send pictures to newsdesks.
5) Your laptop or digital wallet battery pack will always expire 10 minutes before the end of the match with the scores tied and all CF's full.
Or, in this day and age, as will your mobile phone battery.
6) If using only one camera body the wrong lens will always be fitted for the most important shot of the day.
LOL how true.
Or, as only seems to happen to me, you will fumble around in the cold changing lenses in an operation that is second nature, make the change a second too late, and end up having to have your lens mount replaced once every month or so.
7) The pro pack of press 800 you thought you packed at 6.00am will turn out to be provia.
Or, in this day and age, the CF card you thought you'd emptied is actually still full of important pictures. Or, in this day and age, the battery packs you've brought along that you thought were charged are simply, well, not charged.
8) Heavy rain will always occur when you have all of your kit out of the bag.
Or, in this day and age, heavy rain will always occur just when you pull the notebook out to start wiring pictures. While, it might be added, every other photographer has a young technie in the wire room ready to send their pics for them.
9) You will be having a smoke, drink or rummaging in camera bag for film when the shot of the year occurs.
See above about consulting the tiny little LCD on the back of your whizz bang digital.
10) Your CF will be full (or out of film) when the shot of a lifetime occurs; Thus robbing you of every paper and magazine cover in the world and the $$ that goes with it.
Or, as only seems to happen to me, the same would happen, except the bugger next to me would have got the shot of a lifetime, robbing me of the $$ that goes with it.