Sisterly Love

[sonicsneakers88]

Hi, this is the very first photo I've posted on CS.

This is just a candid photo I took on the first day I tried out my new Sony A300.

1. In what area is critique to be sought?

Is the photo underexposed or just nice? How about composition?

2. what one hopes to achieve with the piece of work?

The older girl is keeping her baby sister away from my bicycle which might have toppled over on her and hurt her. I centralised the photo on the empty space between the children and the bicycle to emphasise the distance from the source of injury to the potential victims. Also to show the older sister is performing her duty by distancing them.

3. under what circumstance is the picture taken? (physical conditions/emotions)

A very simple and candid photo taken at Bishan Park in the afternoon.

4. What the critique seeker personally thinks of the picture

I like the candid nature of the photo and also the cute little kids. Also the portrayal of sisterly love.

 

[wildsoyabean]

without reading ur description, i wouldnt know the sisterly love that u claimed in the pic. as such ur composition is not telling the story just by looking at it.
rest of stuff is okie. but when composition fails, nothing else matters

 

[chikubang]

The bicycle is a huge distraction for me. So when I look at this picture, my eyes zoom towards the bicycle instead of the sisters.

 

[night86mare]

i would have really excluded the bicycle here, it does nothing but take away attention from the centerpiece intended here, i.e. the kids.

as for stories to be told, it is nice that you try to tell one, but if the viewer cannot tell the story when looking at the photograph without you telling them what you interpret it as, being there, then you might as well not tell the story at all.

a picture should stand alone, by its own, unless it is a special case, like photojournalism.

 

[luntut]

bike is sharp.

subject is blur.

need i say more?

 

[pokiemon]

sorry i dont see sisterly love...looks like the older sister is molesting the younger one.

 

[sonicsneakers88]

ok thanks for the replies guys. Will take them into consideration.

To pokiemon....er...that was kind of an inappropriate statement? haha! But you have a good point. Obviously I didn't take into consideration that her gesture might be perceived in a wrong way by the viewer.

What do you think if I took it at an angle where the bike is behind the two of them?

 

[calebk]

ok thanks for the replies guys. Will take them into consideration.

To pokiemon....er...that was kind of an inappropriate statement? haha! But you have a good point. Obviously I didn't take into consideration that her gesture might be perceived in a wrong way by the viewer.

What do you think if I took it at an angle where the bike is behind the two of them?

I personally believe it is moot to even consider where the bike is in the frame, or whether it is even included, because the emotions portrayed on the two subjects' faces do not match the story you are trying to tell in the first place.

 

[Galdor]

I find the picture underexposed, not sure if it's my monitor. :dunno:
The bicycle is a major distraction and draws the view's eyes to it instead of the subject. Perhaps cropping it away will be better.

 

[cabbySHE]

It is unanimously agreed that the bike is out, being...

* that bike, its size does not associate with the kids, unless its a children's bike and laid fallen on the grd. and some bruises on the little boys knee or what.

* that helmet lying on the ground for no reason.

* that distractive bench behind the kids

* the little boy's head is blocking his sister ( minor flaw )

Did you ( the photographer ) knock the boy down while cycling and looking for subject ?

 

[cy_j]

Bike and sisters are fine with me, just the title jars the senses a bit. If it were in the line of "Ouch" or somesuch, the upturned helmet, the facial expressions make the pic more cohesive.

 

[pokiemon]

hey sonicsneaker. the bicycle really has no connection to the sisters. the other thing to note is the relative size to the subject. the bicycle is bigger than the sisters and that is why our eyes are drawn to it. one suggestion is to compose the picture such that the sisters are closer to you and the bicycle away from you.

but if you really like the bicycle so much...here is a story i can think of. the bicycle has to be lying on the ground as if the younger sister riding it has fallen off and the older sister comes to help her up (hence showing sisterly love).

 

[cabbySHE]

Bike and sisters are fine with me, ...

The height of that bicycle seat is already way beyond the reach of that little girl.

 

[sonicsneakers88]

haha guys I think you misunderstood my write up a bit. Before that I want to clarify, they are both girls, the smaller one is not a boy

They're the children of my mom's friends. I happened to cycle there cuz my mom forgot her phone. So I very selflessly cycled all the way from Serangoon to Bishan to pass it to her (risking getting knocked down by some @#$@# car driver who sped through my zebra crossing between the parks.)

The little girl was shredding my helmet to bits and then she wanted to pull down my bike. Hope that explains why cabbySHE observed the upturned helmet doing nothing there. It had actually been ravaged by the hungry hands of a little tot. Meanwhile I was resting on my bench (that's a sign of a lazy photographer!) while watching the whole event unfold. The elder sister came and took brought the little girl away when I told her that she might get hurt. Sadly I had pulled out my cam a bit too late and very hastily took this shot.

So in my opinion this photo was taken very unprofessionally. However I took a look at it again and realised that through hindsight and from my own experience that day, it kinda made a bit of sense to me to keep it the way it was. I was actually hoping to focus a bit more on the bike, rather the distance between the bike and girls. I wanted to create a sense of isolation around the bike to show the girls had moved away from it (as a safety precaution). Seriously I don't know how to bring the two girls in relation to the bike to create the overall effect of distancing the two elements from each other. What pokiemon mentioned about the different angle of shooting the bike actually makes much more sense. But my fat bottom was seated on the bench and if i had quickly changed position to take the shot it might have spoilt the whole setting. From this picture the older sister shows no related emotion but now that you know the story I think you can appreciate why the little girl looks grumpy. Lol! The older one was looking at her elder brother who was probably monkeying around. I regret I didn't manage to essentially capture the spirit of sisterly love apart from her escorting her away from the dangerous bike. My title is inappropriate.

It is indeed difficult to take good candid shots. But I posted this photo in here so I could see what other people saw of the picture and what they could tell. Obviously I wasn't really successful in this case from the consensus that the bike should be scrapped and there was no sisterly love:X

Thanks again for your comments!

 

[cabbySHE]

Wow, only you understand the story, and a long one too.

 

[st0pandst4re]

the bike is wayyyyy to distracting
IMO u should have just filled the shot with the 2 kids.

also should have waited for a better shot!
i agree that the older sister looks like shes molesting the younger one!
because the younger sis dosen't look too happy in the pic =\

 

[earthling82]

1) The children seemed to be fighting over something - throwing helmet and stuff. The title could even be Sibling Rivalry dun u think?

2) Bicycle is in too much focus and humans are blurred instead. This throws the subject off focus.

3) Messy background

 

[cheryl852]

The first thing I felt before reading your description was that the elder sister seems to be playful and trying to carry the little one.. Never thought of that bicycle. The little sister seems irritated anyway.. Hence to me this teacher really has no meaning unless you crop away the bicycle part.

just my opinion

 

[kkoge]

and hies cheryl. surprised to see you here.

and. messy background is the utter distaste in the whole image.

ur focused subjects are inappropriate.

it looks like the older one was lifting the (stoning,) younger one away like a load.

just my 0.002 cents worth.