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zaren

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#2
denniskee said:
pls comment on this photo, thanks.

you are halfway towards a really good street shot. what this photo lacks is a counterpoint, which makes the element of coincidence complete. for example, a sign or poster nearby that says "searching for something?" with a man inside the poster looking at the indian man searching his bag. or a cat searching for food in a discarded plastic bag nearby. capture both elements in one photo, and you will have the decisive moment.
 

nemesis32

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#3
Agree with most things zaren says..

the other alternative i can think of is to keep it simple. Crop tightly to eliminate distractions such as the railing. Or even tighter just to capture the anguish of the man trying to find something...
 

Rev

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#5
I beg to differ & disagree with zaren =) the contrasting subject would definitely aid the main subject but those situations are as frequent as winning toto =(

Sometimes, isolation is good too...

The emptiness around the man creates a mood of solitude as if the man is in a world of his own... searching his bag. It also isolates him as the subject with the bag. Normally, I feel the tight crop would work if the man had all his belongings strewn around him but unfortunately, he doesnt. The tight crop also flattens the image and there's conflicting subjects around (his robe, torchlight, bag, head etc) then people would say lack of facial expression and nag nag nag :angry:

Here's what I think shoooould be done instead, crop distracting black stuff on the top, and improve the B&W post-process in fotoshop...Curve up, Variations-Green, Fade until it doesnt look that greenish...

Sorry abt the border, couldnt help it... I like this pic =)
 

eikin

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#6
indeed an interesting figure for streetshoot. dennis do you have a version with a wider frame? would be interesting to know what's around this person judging by the orderly patterns of the floor tiles and horizontal lines of the steps behind.
 

denniskee

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#7
i shot with wa prime lens, but have to crop to the initial posted image as the original includes some distracting legs of passer-by. was not able to zoom in with my legs as it would have alert him. also, i needed the stool (wrong spelling?) for support since its around 2am. setting the tripod would have alert him too.

wider would have been better as i wanted to create a feeling of emptiness, loneliness, which was my mode then.

due to my own unfortunate turn of event, i was searching for meaning of "life" from viewing through the view finder & talking to strangers during my overnight shoots which when i come across him, searching too.

the white rope and black granide stool kind of represent my happier days and the dark period i was in.

i was into shooting stairs and slopes as well, one can view it in 2 ways, one is a path of getting out, or in my case, down to the abyss, burning hell. as with most of my photos with stairs, always shooting downwards to nowhere.

so you see, the stairs in the background is to me, the pass, was high up, in the heaven, but now, like him, @ the lowest level.
 

mattlock

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#8
can you be more specific on what you want commented on?
I'd like to ask if there are any reasons why chose to shoot this indian man, apart from the fact it might have looked interesting as a photo
I don't agree with zaren regarding the part about a sign, I think that is too unsubtle, too forceful in telling the viewer what to think.
I'd also like to ask whether you already decided in your mind that emptyspace=loneliness, and whether this pre-configured notion determines a certain formula for your shots
 

mattlock

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#10
denniskee said:
my heart is a vaccum, empty. you are right, to me, empty =loneliness
I'd like to suggest that you play around and see whether you can be less literal in your photos....you may well be surprised at what loneliness can be expressed as....
 

eikin

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#12
i hope you don't mind me doing this, here's something i thought may be an interesting starting point in processing this image to express your feelings ...

 

eikin

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#14
denniskee said:
nope, doesnt work for me without the steps & the space.
:think: can you show the original without the cropping? maybe we can help work something out on the issue of expressing your idea.
 

denniskee

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#15
unfortunately, both the negative and 4r print i had throw away. only left this softcopy.

will post another moody for critique shot next week.
 

hptay

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#16
Hi Dennis,

I find the photo pleasing to the eye. IMHO, the casually dressed indian man looking into a brief case in such build up area is quite contrasting. Feels like a fish out of water looking for air. Thus the title and photo works for me.

On the other hand, seems to me that the cropping of his right leg was a little abrupt.
 

zaren

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#17
mattlock said:
can you be more specific on what you want commented on?
I'd like to ask if there are any reasons why chose to shoot this indian man, apart from the fact it might have looked interesting as a photo
I don't agree with zaren regarding the part about a sign, I think that is too unsubtle, too forceful in telling the viewer what to think.
I'd also like to ask whether you already decided in your mind that emptyspace=loneliness, and whether this pre-configured notion determines a certain formula for your shots
on second thoughts....yes i agree that photography should not be too formulaic. what i suggested earlier is one school of thought of street photography, which happens to appeal to me more. however, as a photography genre it is obviously much wider than that.

what i now find interesting is the deeper motifs and symbolism that dennis accords the elements in the photo (for example the stairs), which touch him in a personal way. i think that this could form the basis of a larger body of work which allows him to develop and express his own personal search for the meaning of life and convey them through a series of photographs.
 

Rev

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#18
dude, did U shoot this in b&w film? Now I'm curious because of my post-process comment....
 

nemesis32

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#19
denniskee said:
hi nemesis32

do you mean like this?

a bit too tight already.. i would include the legs as he's whole outfit is part of the "story".

The 2 main problems with this pics is 1) what is he searching....(which may or may not need to be reveal in photo, depends on (2)) 2)His expression not evident, anguish i suppose or just puzzled that he cannot find it?
 

denniskee

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#20
hi rev
it shot in color negative, converted via ps.

hi nemesis32
i took another shot actually, he took out more stuff from his bag after the torchlight, however, i find it too loud.

anyway, i have never gotten angry will searching my bag for stuff, do you? i find it kind of odd that you feel he should be.
 

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