Three men were standing in line to get into heaven one day. Apparently it had been
a pretty busy day, though, so Peter had to tell the first one, "Heaven's getting pretty
close to full today, and I've been asked to admit only people who have had particularly
horrible deaths. So what's your story?"
So the first man replies:
"Well, for a while I've suspected my wife has been cheating on me, so today I came
home early to try to catch her red-handed. As I came into my 25th floor apartment,
I could tell something was wrong, but all my searching around didn't reveal where this
other guy could have been hiding. Finally, I went out to the balcony, and sure enough,
there was this man hanging off the railing, 25 floors above ground! By now I was really
mad, so I started beating on him and kicking him, but wouldn't you know it, he wouldn't
fall off.
So finally I went back into my apartment, got a hammer and starting hammering on his
fingers. Of course, he couldn't stand that for long, so he let go and fell -- but even after
25 stories, he fell into the bushes, stunned but okay. I couldn't stand it anymore, so I ran
into the kitchen, grabbed the fridge and threw it over the edge where it landed on him,
killing him instantly. But all the stress and anger got to me, and I had a heart attack and
died there on the balcony."
"That sounds like a pretty bad day to me," said Peter, and let the man in.
The second man comes up and Peter explains to him about heaven being full, and again asks
for his story.
"It's been a very strange day. You see, I live on the 26th floor of my apartment building,
and every morning I do my exercises out on my balcony. Well, this morning I must have
slipped or something, because I fell over the edge. But I got lucky, and caught the railing
of the balcony on the floor below me. I knew I couldn't hang on for very long, when suddenly
this man burst out onto the balcony. I thought for sure I was saved, when he started
beating on me and kicking me. I held on the best I could until he ran into the apartment,
grabbed a hammer and started pounding on my hands. Finally I just let go, but again I got
lucky and fell into the bushes below, stunned but all right. Just when I was thinking I was
going to be okay, this refrigerator comes falling out of the sky and crushes me instantly,
and now I'm here."
Once again, Peter had to concede that that sounded like a pretty horrible death.
The third man came to the front of the line, and again the whole process was repeated.
Peter explained that heaven was full and asked for his story.
"Picture this," says the third man, "I'm hiding naked inside a refrigerator..."
a pretty busy day, though, so Peter had to tell the first one, "Heaven's getting pretty
close to full today, and I've been asked to admit only people who have had particularly
horrible deaths. So what's your story?"
So the first man replies:
"Well, for a while I've suspected my wife has been cheating on me, so today I came
home early to try to catch her red-handed. As I came into my 25th floor apartment,
I could tell something was wrong, but all my searching around didn't reveal where this
other guy could have been hiding. Finally, I went out to the balcony, and sure enough,
there was this man hanging off the railing, 25 floors above ground! By now I was really
mad, so I started beating on him and kicking him, but wouldn't you know it, he wouldn't
fall off.
So finally I went back into my apartment, got a hammer and starting hammering on his
fingers. Of course, he couldn't stand that for long, so he let go and fell -- but even after
25 stories, he fell into the bushes, stunned but okay. I couldn't stand it anymore, so I ran
into the kitchen, grabbed the fridge and threw it over the edge where it landed on him,
killing him instantly. But all the stress and anger got to me, and I had a heart attack and
died there on the balcony."
"That sounds like a pretty bad day to me," said Peter, and let the man in.
The second man comes up and Peter explains to him about heaven being full, and again asks
for his story.
"It's been a very strange day. You see, I live on the 26th floor of my apartment building,
and every morning I do my exercises out on my balcony. Well, this morning I must have
slipped or something, because I fell over the edge. But I got lucky, and caught the railing
of the balcony on the floor below me. I knew I couldn't hang on for very long, when suddenly
this man burst out onto the balcony. I thought for sure I was saved, when he started
beating on me and kicking me. I held on the best I could until he ran into the apartment,
grabbed a hammer and started pounding on my hands. Finally I just let go, but again I got
lucky and fell into the bushes below, stunned but all right. Just when I was thinking I was
going to be okay, this refrigerator comes falling out of the sky and crushes me instantly,
and now I'm here."
Once again, Peter had to concede that that sounded like a pretty horrible death.
The third man came to the front of the line, and again the whole process was repeated.
Peter explained that heaven was full and asked for his story.
"Picture this," says the third man, "I'm hiding naked inside a refrigerator..."
