Japanese student


#1
1. in what area is critique to be sought?

mainly on feel and composition

2. what one hopes to achieve with the piece of work?

sharp, clear, natural

3. under what circumstance is the picture taken? (physical conditions/emotions)

sunny day

4. what the critique seeker personally thinks of the picture

i didnt think much of it as i shoot it according to my feel..,but on the overall..,it gives me a sense of mystery.

 

Nov 26, 2009
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#2
Hi,

I'm hope I'm not being too harsh. Here goes.

Just want to check, did you place a golden reflector or equivalent to produce the yellow light on her face?
The yellow light is pretty unpleasant to me. It is not very desirable as personally it spoilt the delicate feel of a girl's skin.
Comparing her face to her hand, I'd prefer the hands' skin tone

For a personal preference, I'd prefer the key light source to her face to be slightly elevated so the lighting will appear to blend in with the natural lighting around her.

Also, I can't really understand the model's expression. It's kinda lukewarm yet contradicting. What I mean is her hands are up by her cheeks but it doesn't enhance her cuteness. Either way, if you meant to portray fear it's also not intense enough.

Her smile is not very natural. Pretty awkward I'd say. If you use your hand to cover her eyes, you will realise that she is smiling pretty gently. However when you cover her mouth instead, her eyes speaks of nothing.
You might need to communicate more with your model to achieve better results.

I can't feel any mystery going on in this photo. To me it's quite a standard portrait attempt with a pretty standard composition.

Hope it helps in anyway.
 

daredevil123

Moderator
Staff member
Oct 25, 2005
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lil red dot
#3
I am not sure how you did your fill in or PP, it looks pretty messed up. The face looks yellow and a lot darker than her hands. It looks especially bad when her hands are right smack to her face.

Also, the light (golden reflector I supposed) is very harsh, revealing flaws in the models skin in the nose area and the area between the eyes. I think in this case, using a matt white reflector would work better, since the light is yellow anywhere in this picture.
 

Jan 27, 2010
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#5
for your 2nd pic, i feel the hand is out of place at the back. Its kinda distracting as well.

Even after cropping away the hand, the composition turns very normal. The wall does not help much too. A better background and pose would help in the picture. Watch out for the overexposed side on the left. Her uniform is totally washed out. Perhaps you could use less harsh light.

The hair on her right looks freckled as well, maybe you could do something about it.

Overall i think the sharpness looks good enough to me, but work on your composition and the colour tone and overexposure... ;p
 

Jan 28, 2010
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Ha Noi, Vietnam, Vietnam
#7
I think there's a problem with the shadow on the right half of her nose. It makes her nose looks bigger and unflattering. Same thing as other people said about the yellow light on the face. I think a brighter smile would work better with that pose too
 

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