Concentration...

[dorts]

Hello,

I need critiques for this image. (From my APAD)

1) I am trying to portray the child engrossed and concentrated in what he is doing. And to add a little twist. I decided to add blur to the picture. Blur concentration.

2) Does the B&W with the blur work for you in this picture? Do you think there is too much blur? I'm also trying to tell people, not only sharp pictures are nice, blur, OOF pictures can as well.

3) Do you think this composition is good? I composed this way is because I wanted his two legs to cover the 2 sides of the bottom-left corner. And wanted to allow viewers to see what he was doing as well as his face expression, which in this case, should be concentration.

4) I actually think the picture doesn't really give the really concentrated feeling. What do you think?

Thank you people.

 

[bomber72]

I am not too into photography, but I think the picture does not bring out the "CONCENTRATION" theme that you are trying to potrait.

Also think that the blury look make matter worse... my 2 cents worth.

 

[southundeep]

I am no pro, more like a noob. To me the global blurring does not help the picture at all. There is an absence of focal point. Also, the focus of the picture are the light areas on the child's shirt and sock. The angle of the child's face makes it difficult to see the concentration that you are aiming to achieve in this pic. By the way, not sure what you mean by "blur concentration."

I like to tight crop though... keep shooting!

 

[grantyale]

Can't figure out what the kid is doing... and the facial expression is hard to see.

 

[dorts]

I guess the blur doesn't work for this picture. I think maybe I've blurred the picture too much. The original picture, the face expression could be seen. I'll maybe post one without the blur later. Hope to receive more feedback. Harsh critiques are welcomed.

 

[tauhu]

hey the blur doesnt work well. i think it would look better if the kid is in focus, with a good dof.

 

[macson]

the whole picture is just blur. sorry.

 

[night86mare]

we take it with titling first - concentration. what do you think when you hear "concentration" when it comes to people and emotions/actions? you need to express the idea clearly. here at first glance i see a photograph of a boy holding a pencil - correct me if i'm wrong. i suppose i could imagine that he is concentrating, but i cannot see it. certainly it is not wrong to show an indirect interpretation of concentration, i could imagine that he is concentrating, but that is only because of your title. if you had titled it "boy with pencil" i would not imagine this at all. this means that you are telling me what to think, you have to tell me what you wish to express.. which shouldn't be the case. there are many ways of showing concentration, from the top of my head i could imagine that a scene where a lot of people are milling about the boy, but he is still engrossed in his own little world.. that context would show concentration even though i cannot see his intense expression. another way which has been indirectly mentioned in the previous sentence, is of course, pure facial expression.

title aside, the photograph still does not work for me.

why? certainly putting it into black and white is fine, that is anybody's choice to express it, and blackandwhite often gives the advantage of removing distracting colour, lending focus to a scene, placing emphasis on certain areas that would not be highlighted if it were not blackandwhite. the blur is also fine. as i had highlighted in a kopitiam thread here, along with many fine examples provided by various people (and me), sharpness is indeed overrated. as schon quotes someone in that thread, there is nothing worse than a sharp photo of a fuzzy concept. blurness is great, when you put it to good use. but making a photo blur just because you can, is not correct.

i would also like to highlight that while most of the people here are fair in expressing their viewpoint of "the blur not working", i think some people should place more effort into explaining what they mean, instead of just saying "whole picture just blur.". take a look at the link provided and you'll see that blur pictures WORK. it's just how you do it.

but back to the photograph. why does the blur not work? because there is no concept to the photo, no clear idea to be seen or expressed, not even the most basic one of beauty/aesthetics. first and foremost, composition is messy. there is no order of the boy's form, the limbs are splayed all over the place and i would give you the fact that you cannot control him, but you could control your angle and framing. to get a good idea of what i mean by a blur photo with a clear concept, even more important because people have to see past the blur, we do not see things blurly in life, to put it in another way.. look here. it doesn't get any blurrier than this.. yet you look at most of the photos, you do get a sense of what the maker is trying to express there.

cheers

 

[dorts]

Thank you very much! Hope I understood what you were trying to say.

For a blur image to work, it has to still be able to convey what the photographer is trying to convey, and the viewer should be able to tell the meaning behind it. My image was just blurring with no reason.

The title I chose was not a good one at all. It doesn't convey what I'm trying to say. It's only my own thinking. I should look at other's point of view, on how they see the image. Right?


The boy was holding a stick, digging the sand. Although there is no end to digging, he continued for a long time.

Here is the original coloured image:

Thank you once more, really appriciate it.

 

[m3lv1nh0]

IMHO,
The original unblur version looks better but we still can't see what the kid is doing with the pencil. Is he digging the sand or poking some insect, we wouldn't know. The green/white socks also drawn my attention away from the kid's face.

You can use another angle or using dof, isolate only the face/eyes and his hands to convey the msg of "concentration". Of course it's not as simple as it sound.. have to depend on luck too. Haha.

 

[dorts]

IMHO,
The original unblur version looks better but we still can't see what the kid is doing with the pencil. Is he digging the sand or poking some insect, we wouldn't know. The green/white socks also drawn my attention away from the kid's face.

You can use another angle or using dof, isolate only the face/eyes and his hands to convey the msg of "concentration". Of course it's not as simple as it sound.. have to depend on luck too. Haha.

Points taken. Thanks.