Babies & Photography


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#1
;) Enjoy this. Got this in an email.

>>After years of frustration, the Smiths had no children and decided
>>to
>>use a proxy father to start their family. On the day the proxy
>>father
>>was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The
>>man
>>should be here soon".
>>Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby
>>photographer
>>rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.
>>
>>"Good morning madam. You don't know me, but I've come to..."
>>
>>"Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut
>>in.
>>
>>"Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good! I've made a
>>specialty of babies."
>>
>>"That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a
>>seat.
>>Just where do we start?" asked Mrs. Smith, blushing.
>>
>>"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on
>>the
>>couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room
>>floor is fun too;
>>you can really spread out."
>>
>>"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for Harry and
>>me."
>>
>>"Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But
>>if we try several different positions
>>and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased
>>with the results."
>>
>>"I hope we can get this over with quickly," gasped Mrs. Smith.
>>
>>"Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to
>>be in and out in five minutes,
>>but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure."
>>
>>"Don't I know it!!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed.
>>
>>The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of
>>his baby pictures.
>>"This was done on the top of a bus in downtown London."
>>
>>"Oh my god!!", Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging at her handkerchief.
>>
>>"And these twins turned out exceptionally well when you consider
>>their mother was
>>so difficult to work with." The photographer handed Mrs. Smith the
>>picture.
>>
>>"She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.
>>
>>"Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to Hyde Park to get
>>the
>>job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep,
>>pushing to get a good look."
>>
>>"Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes widened in amazement.
>>
>>"Yes", the photographer said. "And for more than three hours, too.
>>The mother was constantly
>>squealing and yelling. I could hardly concentrate. Then darkness
>>approached and I began to rush
>>my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my
>>equipment, I just packed it all in."
>>
>>Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean they actually chewed on your,
>>eh...equipment?"
>>
>>"That's right. Well madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod
>>so
>>that we can get to work."
>>
>>"Tripod??" Mrs. Smith looked extremely worried now.
>>
>>"Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too
>>big for me to hold while I'm getting ready for action."
>>
>>.....Mrs. Smith fainted!!
 

plinius

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May 22, 2003
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#2
heh...this is really funny! esp the last part!

btw I've a Canon too....


mageditor said:
;) Enjoy this. Got this in an email.

>>After years of frustration, the Smiths had no children and decided
>>to
>>use a proxy father to start their family. On the day the proxy
>>father
>>was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The
>>man
>>should be here soon".
>>Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby
>>photographer
>>rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale.
>>
>>"Good morning madam. You don't know me, but I've come to..."
>>
>>"Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut
>>in.
>>
>>"Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good! I've made a
>>specialty of babies."
>>
>>"That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a
>>seat.
>>Just where do we start?" asked Mrs. Smith, blushing.
>>
>>"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on
>>the
>>couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room
>>floor is fun too;
>>you can really spread out."
>>
>>"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for Harry and
>>me."
>>
>>"Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But
>>if we try several different positions
>>and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased
>>with the results."
>>
>>"I hope we can get this over with quickly," gasped Mrs. Smith.
>>
>>"Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to
>>be in and out in five minutes,
>>but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure."
>>
>>"Don't I know it!!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed.
>>
>>The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of
>>his baby pictures.
>>"This was done on the top of a bus in downtown London."
>>
>>"Oh my god!!", Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging at her handkerchief.
>>
>>"And these twins turned out exceptionally well when you consider
>>their mother was
>>so difficult to work with." The photographer handed Mrs. Smith the
>>picture.
>>
>>"She was difficult?" asked Mrs. Smith.
>>
>>"Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to Hyde Park to get
>>the
>>job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep,
>>pushing to get a good look."
>>
>>"Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes widened in amazement.
>>
>>"Yes", the photographer said. "And for more than three hours, too.
>>The mother was constantly
>>squealing and yelling. I could hardly concentrate. Then darkness
>>approached and I began to rush
>>my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my
>>equipment, I just packed it all in."
>>
>>Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean they actually chewed on your,
>>eh...equipment?"
>>
>>"That's right. Well madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod
>>so
>>that we can get to work."
>>
>>"Tripod??" Mrs. Smith looked extremely worried now.
>>
>>"Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too
>>big for me to hold while I'm getting ready for action."
>>
>>.....Mrs. Smith fainted!!
 

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