July 2, 2009 by cynicalangmo
I like Singapore. I like Singaporeans. Some of my best friends are Singaporean. Some of my girlfriends are Singaporean.
But Singaporeans really are frustratingly stupid. Fortunately their birthrate is only about 1.25, so they will all die off soon enough. Hopefully the Chinese, Malays, and Indians that replace them will be smarter.
In Singapore you drive on the left, like the UK, Australia, and Japan. So when you walk on the footpath, what side should you walk on? Well, it makes sense to me for it to be the left as well. But maybe that isn’t a big issue.
When you ride a pushbike on the road, which side should you ride on? Surely that makes sense? Nope, in Singapore they ride on the right. And when I tell them they are stupid **** they get upset. When I shout obscenities to wakr them up they look dumb. Well, d’uh YOU ARE ****ING DUMB!!!
And then there are the so-called cycling and walking tracks at places like Pasir Ris park or East Coast. Walk on the walking track, ride and blade on the cycle track? That makes sense doesn’t it? Not in Singapore. You walk and jog on the walking trace, and you walk and jog on the cycle track. And you get upset when I tell you to GET OUT OF MY ****ING WAY. Dumb *****. All of them.
But that’s not enough. They walk and jog both with the cycle traffic and against it. Lanes are clearly marked, even with arrows. I am going to start running into people.
And then there are the cyclists. I can almost forgive the stupidity of the children, but the parents are negligent, and obviously have no care or love for their children. They let them ride off on learner bikes unaccompanied and without road sense. They stop suddenly, turn suddenly, without understanding the big white guy on the bike behind them will crush all the life out of them if they hit. Warning: if I have a choice between me and your little darling being hurt, it ain’t going to be me. Keep them close, teach them not to be little ****wits.
And pay attention when you ride. Don’t stop in the cycle lane. In bunches. Or turn your bike perpendicular to the lane (that’s a really smart thing to do. Typically teenage girls. And these little bitches will be driving cars soon. I can only hope they have been killed off before they have the chance to do real damage. Or procreate).
I won’t even start on the schools that use the parks for class excursions without supervising their students, use the cycle lanes for cross-country running, and so on. They are just ignorant scum. If they had any real brains they wouldn’t be teachers.
I don’t like criticising the intellectually handicapped, but in Singapore there would be few left others to criticise.