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Thread: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

  1. #21

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by flipfreak View Post
    maybe the maid is muslim and cannot eat pork? then she go in and see them eat also senseless right?
    In that case, I take care of the baby while she gets halal food. It's my kid, therefore my responsibility.
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  2. #22
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    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    if i were to have a maid...

    on 2nd thoughts.

    and if i were to bring her out with the family.

    we would go to a restaurant what would serve halal food or at least we would go to a muslim restaurant for a meal... and let her choose what she liked to eat. and of course reward her for her hard work for that 1-2 weeks kind of thing...

    i mean. even if shes a "maid", theres also a need to treat others nicely.

  3. #23

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Why is this a debatable issue?
    A maid,holds the similar boss-employee relationship that you share with your higher-ups in your company.Do they make you stand outside the restuarant while they enjoy their meals?Do they physically abuse you?
    Thought worthy.

  4. #24
    Senior Member denniskee's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by xziredmp View Post
    at the very least.

    tim sum gt vegetarian one what.... and if they knew going for timsum non halal... WHY on earth would they want to go there....

    senseless right ?
    still, the maids will need to help out eg. take care of kids, groceries shopping.
    photography makes one sees things from all angles.

  5. #25
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    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by denniskee View Post
    still, the maids will need to help out eg. take care of kids, groceries shopping.
    true.....

    its saturday.... sometimes... over reliance on maids are just too much...

    for me... sometimes i do not understand why there is just why some people rely on maids that much ?

    i've seen families in singapore who have 5-6 kids and they do not have a maid, and the husband and wife takes control of all of them equally well, and although some of them misbehave, but they look happy to start with.

    so far.... i believe they are one of the most happening families i've seen.. 5 kids and theres no such thing as "hell break loose" for them.

  6. #26

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by paesyl View Post
    You PAID your maid (Boss and staff relation) but others dun pay you (Friend friend relation).



    Agreed

    Making maid sit outside is bad. But sitting together means eating the same food??? If you eat Shark Fin will you order one set for her???
    Give your maid time or day off if you think that it is expensive to give her the treat!...

  7. #27

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Xtol19 View Post
    Does your CEO invite you to fly first class with him?
    So your answer is that you will make the maid wait for your outside the restaurant while you are having a meal....

  8. #28

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    thats exactly why i go for non muslim domestic help. Even for those from indonesia, there are some who are christians like mine so food is not a problem.

    For me, i really see no need to make her wait outside. just eat together lah, knn safe a few $ cannot get you a L lens lah. And its like a small reward for them for taking care of the family's needs so why fuss about it? I even pay for my domestic help's expenses when the family travel and bring her along.

    I am not rich but i just like to put myself in a position and think if my boss treats me bad, how would i feel and i dun want my helper to feel this way especially if you are going to put your kids in their care right?

  9. #29
    Senior Member azul123's Avatar
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    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by xziredmp View Post
    for me... sometimes i do not understand why there is just why some people rely on maids that much ?

    i've seen families in singapore who have 5-6 kids and they do not have a maid, and the husband and wife takes control of all of them equally well, and although some of them misbehave, but they look happy to start with.

    so far.... i believe they are one of the most happening families i've seen.. 5 kids and theres no such thing as "hell break loose" for them.
    Hehehe... you describing me ah?

    I never had maids and never thought about it ever, my wife takes care of all our children ourselves not leaving them to our parents nor to anyone elses care since my first born some 24+ years ago.

    I am happy that all my children have our values not someone elses.. It shudders when I see children mistreating and shouting at their maids and also where maid abuses their charges under their care... maybe this is their tit for tat?

    ../azul123

  10. #30

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Yappy View Post
    So your answer is that you will make the maid wait for your outside the restaurant while you are having a meal....
    Well, there are too many people on moral high horses here. The fact is that maids are servants, like drivers, gardeners, etc.

    While one should not look down on them, is there anything wrong with asking the maid to wait outside if one has provided adequate food and refreshment for her? It's your choice if you want to have your maid eat abalone and shark's fin at your $8,000 table in a top Chinese restaurant, but why do you have to comment on others who don't want to? Can't we respect their choices?

    As mentioned, CEO's do not have their drivers with them at their clubs for lunch, the drivers wait outside and they do not starve. Are all CEO's who do so morally wrong?

    And similarly, if you and your CEO go on a business trip, he flies first class, and you fly economy-- exactly as company policy states-- is there anything wrong?

  11. #31

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    IMO, some people are blurring the line between a maid and a slave.
    So have your bosses never treated you to a meal at all? Why be so calculative? You're human, she's human... what if it was you who had to go to another country to work as a maid? What kind of thoughts would you have if you were to be made to stand outside the restaurant while your 'bosses' eat? At the very least, maybe they could have got her into the restaurant too (whether she eats or not is another matter).

  12. #32

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by lypklypk View Post
    IMO, some people are blurring the line between a maid and a slave.
    So have your bosses never treated you to a meal at all? Why be so calculative? You're human, she's human... what if it was you who had to go to another country to work as a maid? What kind of thoughts would you have if you were to be made to stand outside the restaurant while your 'bosses' eat? At the very least, maybe they could have got her into the restaurant too (whether she eats or not is another matter).
    this is where u are wrong. u are thinking many ppl treat maids like slave, when many ppl think of maids, ad just that, maids. not family members. asking the maid to wait outside (provided of coz its not raining or anything bad) is logical and is within the purview of the employer. same things as a ceo or anyone rich enuf to have a driver will not ask their driver to dine with them everytime they go for lunch or something. remember that some ppl have maid quarters and don live in the main bulding. is that morally wrong?
    おれのflickrださ

  13. #33

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Xtol19 View Post
    Well, there are too many people on moral high horses here. The fact is that maids are servants, like drivers, gardeners, etc.

    While one should not look down on them, is there anything wrong with asking the maid to wait outside if one has provided adequate food and refreshment for her? It's your choice if you want to have your maid eat abalone and shark's fin at your $8,000 table in a top Chinese restaurant, but why do you have to comment on others who don't want to? Can't we respect their choices?

    As mentioned, CEO's do not have their drivers with them at their clubs for lunch, the drivers wait outside and they do not starve. Are all CEO's who do so morally wrong?

    And similarly, if you and your CEO go on a business trip, he flies first class, and you fly economy-- exactly as company policy states-- is there anything wrong?

    I agreed with you. There is a limit to anything one can and supposed to do. If I am going to a posh restaurant, I would not bring my maid along. I would rather give her dayoff or timeoff.

    The restaurant that I visited that Saturday was a normal restaurant found at the mall. The food was slightly more expensive than the food court...so would you allow the maid to join you?

  14. #34

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by phoakm View Post
    I will still treat my maid for the meals, no matter how costly it is, because she has done great deeds in helping my house chores, cooking and taking care of my handicapped mum. I consider her as a friend, rather than maid.

  15. #35

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Yappy View Post
    I agreed with you. There is a limit to anything one can and supposed to do. If I am going to a posh restaurant, I would not bring my maid along. I would rather give her dayoff or timeoff.

    The restaurant that I visited that Saturday was a normal restaurant found at the mall. The food was slightly more expensive than the food court...so would you allow the maid to join you?

    Have you really agreed on the fundamentals? If so, there would not be a need for such a question, or even this thread.
    Last edited by Xtol19; 13th April 2009 at 02:45 PM.

  16. #36

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Xtol19 View Post
    Have you really agreed on the fundamentals? If so, there would not be a need for such a question.
    To me there are more than one basics..

    1. Master & Slave relationship
    2. Master & servant relationship
    3. Employer & employee relationship
    4. Employer & friend relationship
    5. Employer & member of the family relationship

    The one you choose determine the fundamentals.

  17. #37

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    This eternal debate resembles a typical deontological vs utilitarian ethical perspective on how you should treat your maid.

  18. #38

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Yappy View Post
    To me there are more than one basics..

    1. Master & Slave relationship
    2. Master & servant relationship
    3. Employer & employee relationship
    4. Employer & friend relationship
    5. Employer & member of the family relationship

    The one you choose determine the fundamentals.
    Those are not the fundamentals.

  19. #39

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Xtol19 View Post
    Those are not the fundamentals.
    I can't believe I'm reading this.

    At this day and age, what FUNDAMENTAL are you talking about???

    Servants?? Next time you take your maid outside, try telling the passerby that this is your servant. You'll be regarded as a Fundamentalist, that's for sure.

    When you bring someone into your home, regardless of how much you do or don't pay, to look after your family, that person becomes a part of your family and needed to be treated as such. Can't accept that? Get a part-time maid instead.

  20. #40

    Default Re: Having Tim Sum one Saturday Morning.....

    Think the moral high horse is preventing people from seeing the fundamentals.

    Quote Originally Posted by Gunbucker View Post
    I can't believe I'm reading this.

    At this day and age, what FUNDAMENTAL are you talking about???

    Servants?? Next time you take your maid outside, try telling the passerby that this is your servant. You'll be regarded as a Fundamentalist, that's for sure.

    When you bring someone into your home, regardless of how much you do or don't pay, to look after your family, that person becomes a part of your family and needed to be treated as such. Can't accept that? Get a part-time maid instead.

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