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Thread: Keep an eye on domestic helper (Merged thread)

  1. #21

    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    Quote Originally Posted by joe View Post
    When my wife want to employ a maid at home,I'm totally disagree with here cos she don't really understand them and yet her mind was thinking this accidant was not to suppost happen to her side. So I quick call up my aunt to talk to her,if i talk to here there were be a quarrel.So I call my aunt and tell here what happen cos my house is empty everyone no one at home.Everyone is headed to work and left the maid at home.
    Though I don't have the foggiest idea what you're trying to say, I would never, ever leave my young children ALONE with outsiders. I'd rather leave them at a proper childcare center, or preferably at my parents' place.

    It is very, very hard to know how monstrous or ruthless a person is from the surface, regardless of that person's nationality, ethnicity, or gender.

    I just hope this monster of a maid gets her just punishment.

  2. #22

    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    to keep up with living in singapore, couples enter the working world together. late nights are not unusual. hence having a maid is the best option if the couple can afford one. it is better than to dump kids with granny and let her suffer running after kids daily and feed, cloth and bath them individually. i had a cousin struggling with his job to support 3 kids and retied parents. his wife had to work to contribute. he dump his kids to parents. in the end, his siblings hated him for doing so as his parents suffered in terms of health as they have to look after the kids for him.

    the digital eye is the best way to monitor. it cost a few hundreds dollars for peace of mind.

    as for maid abusing children, there are also many untold stories of maids being abused locally with owner slapping them, starving them, depriving them of sufficient sleep, abusing them with words and even some sexually, etc. for $300 a mth, some maids work a full 18 hrs shift with only two off days a year.

    so, let not the focus on evil maids. treat them well and kindness will usually be returned. well of course, managing maids is never easy as they have a mind of their own and they can talk and interfere. it can rake family politics anytime putting wife and mother in law into fights.

    but what to do. this is singapore. its about solving work problems, marriage problems, wife and parents problems, kids problem. one of the comfort is having a maid to buffer the woes and lead a slightly better quality of life.

    once you are old, go JB and retire lor.

  3. #23

    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    Quote Originally Posted by Gunbucker View Post
    Though I don't have the foggiest idea what you're trying to say, I would never, ever leave my young children ALONE with outsiders. I'd rather leave them at a proper childcare center, or preferably at my parents' place.

    It is very, very hard to know how monstrous or ruthless a person is from the surface, regardless of that person's nationality, ethnicity, or gender.

    I just hope this monster of a maid gets her just punishment.
    child care are also outsiders. i heard of horror stories of housewife type child care putting durian shells in a sectioned area to prevent toddlers from crawling out the perimeter. that housewive was caught shopping during work.
    some care givers give sleeping drugs to make them sleep just enough for parents to pick them up. you never know too cos you are not in there also.

    as for chcild care centre, the other problems will be bad influence from other kids (eg vulgar words, odd habits) and also contagious diseases from other kids and care givers. improper diet when the centre cut cost and substitute proper food with junk or low quality food/beverage.

    There is a risk in everything. there is really no one perfect solution perhaps.

  4. #24
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    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    Quote Originally Posted by Gunbucker View Post
    Though I don't have the foggiest idea what you're trying to say, I would never, ever leave my young children ALONE with outsiders. I'd rather leave them at a proper childcare center, or preferably at my parents' place.

    It is very, very hard to know how monstrous or ruthless a person is from the surface, regardless of that person's nationality, ethnicity, or gender.

    I just hope this monster of a maid gets her just punishment.

    I do agree with you, my friend.Thats why I'm sending my son for a full day child care centre which is more safer than employ a maid at home.You were never know what happen by the time you know everything, it already too late. Cry no tears out. what can you and I do. The very most send the maid back,thats all we can do and they can change their name and come back to singapore to work as a maid.

    Angry also cannot do anything but life still goes on.

  5. #25

    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    Quote Originally Posted by contaxable View Post
    child care are also outsiders. i heard of horror stories of housewife type child care putting durian shells in a sectioned area to prevent toddlers from crawling out the perimeter. that housewive was caught shopping during work.
    some care givers give sleeping drugs to make them sleep just enough for parents to pick them up. you never know too cos you are not in there also.

    as for chcild care centre, the other problems will be bad influence from other kids (eg vulgar words, odd habits) and also contagious diseases from other kids and care givers. improper diet when the centre cut cost and substitute proper food with junk or low quality food/beverage.

    There is a risk in everything. there is really no one perfect solution perhaps.
    Every approach has its folly. What matters is the checks and balances to arrest the situation before it goes too far.

    How will I know if my child gets abused by the maid, day after day, little by little, inflicting small yet significant mental scars during the child's most fragile developing years. If you have a great idea to this, I'd like to know as it will save me LOTS of money from sending my child to a reputable child care center.

    Bad influence from other kids. Heck, in other parts of the world, this is known as developing people skills!! I'd rather my child grow up with other children, both good and bad, so that down the line, the child will know how to survive, and not be a naive bumbling idiot getting suckered into an MLM scheme over a cup of StarBucks with his/her so-called "friend".

    So I'm weighing my options here:
    a) Leave my child with a maid
    b) Leave my child among the mean streets of a reputable childcare center among other (scary movie soundtrack) c-h-i-l-d-r-e-n, and in the hands of a trained caregiver

    I'm kinda splitting hairs here. Decisions, decisions.
    Last edited by Gunbucker; 4th April 2009 at 01:10 PM.

  6. #26

    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    only cowards abuse children. Sick video.

  7. #27

    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    Quote Originally Posted by Pearlang View Post
    I would chop her to pieces if she was my maid.
    I remember many years back, a supervisor of my company made her "evil maid" kneel down in front of her child for 2 hrs and wake the maid up at the middle of the night and send her back to the her origin country.

    Or you can let go your rottwiler or pitbull to tame your "evil maid", who care, as long as you are rich and ready to face the court ....

  8. #28

    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    Quote Originally Posted by Gunbucker View Post

    So I'm weighing my options here:
    a) Leave my child with a maid
    b) Leave my child among the mean streets of a reputable childcare center among other (scary movie soundtrack) c-h-i-l-d-r-e-n, and in the hands of a trained caregiver

    I'm kinda splitting hairs here. Decisions, decisions.
    Well, bite the bullet and have both. I do not believe in childcare personally. I believe in sending children to a good school to learn phonics (usually these are called play-schools). A max of 4hrs a day is good enough which includes some play time. A good pre kindergarten can cost about $600 per child per month and the teaching is intense and very focused.

    Child care session is long and sometimes washed down as the key element is about value. Well, i am not doubting there are great child cares out there, but sometimes, it is the teacher that makes a load of difference.

    As for the maid, she will see them off in school bus to pre-kindergarten. The maid is the communication channel when the adults are not home. You should know kids love to tell stories and have their ways around to get what they want.

    In contrast of the above, I have come across kids who study at home, go to ***. No tuition. Self study. They top the class usually. When i chat up with these parents, they are very caring and spend a tremendous amount of time with their kids and plough through their homework together. They cant afford a maid. Spouse quit job and spend quality time with kids.

    So, there is no real good way to solve the same problem. There are sacrifices to be made. Spending money is easy, but still playing a good parent is still the most important part of a child's upbringing.

  9. #29
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    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    i guess a quick way is to ask yourself, what did you parents do? and how did you turn out?
    ((=

    no need to re-invent the wheel..hehe
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  10. #30
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    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    i do believe domestic helpers are trained more on cleaning & maintaining the home- do housework. if i have a kid the maid is not the 1st person that comes to mind where looking after a small kid is concern.

    if the growing up years are that important, oni the best money can afford will suffice. the costs of doing things 'cheap' has a future "cost", be it physical or psychological on the precious little 1...
    have u seen the "light" yet?

  11. #31
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    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    Quote Originally Posted by contaxable View Post
    child care are also outsiders. i heard of horror stories of housewife type child care putting durian shells in a sectioned area to prevent toddlers from crawling out the perimeter. that housewive was caught shopping during work.
    some care givers give sleeping drugs to make them sleep just enough for parents to pick them up. you never know too cos you are not in there also.

    as for chcild care centre, the other problems will be bad influence from other kids (eg vulgar words, odd habits) and also contagious diseases from other kids and care givers. improper diet when the centre cut cost and substitute proper food with junk or low quality food/beverage.
    There is a risk in everything. there is really no one perfect solution perhaps.
    I helped out in a day care centre with my gf before for a day and i saw the whole day's activities and program.

    What shocked me alot was the lunch... Plain rice with 2 braised chicken wing!!! I had the SAME PORTION as the kids and I almost dieded, some of the kids asked for more wings/rice but there weren't enough...I wanted to refill at least my rice but i refrained and let the kids ate more.

    The child care centre is those void deck types, so its pretty small. If i were to send my kids in the future to child care centre, i would send them to those larger establishments. I'd rather pay more than to make my child suffer.
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  12. #32
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    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    Quote Originally Posted by tkbonz View Post
    I helped out in a day care centre with my gf before for a day and i saw the whole day's activities and program.

    What shocked me alot was the lunch... Plain rice with 2 braised chicken wing!!! I had the SAME PORTION as the kids and I almost dieded, some of the kids asked for more wings/rice but there weren't enough...I wanted to refill at least my rice but i refrained and let the kids ate more.

    The child care centre is those void deck types, so its pretty small. If i were to send my kids in the future to child care centre, i would send them to those larger establishments. I'd rather pay more than to make my child suffer.
    eh, if you got kids pack a seperate mealbox. even extra serving of cereal bars,yoghurt bars can be a healthy addition to a meal.
    have u seen the "light" yet?

  13. #33
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    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    Quote Originally Posted by sORe-EyEz View Post
    eh, if you got kids pack a seperate mealbox. even extra serving of cereal bars,yoghurt bars can be a healthy addition to a meal.
    The parents who subscribed their kids to the day care centre pays money and would be expecting that the child will be well looked after (eg. nutrition in this case). If the kids are instructed to pack extra, whats the point of providing lunch in the first place? The rice + 2 wings is a cost cutting measure, much to my distaste.

    OT alot liao...

    Anyway, i believe that if you want to have children, as a parent, you should be the one looking after your own kids. I won't trust a maid to take care of my children. A parent's touch can never compare with a maid's upbringing. If you say you no time to take care of children, then don't even have children in the first place. IMHO.
    Dun blame the camera...blame the one behind the viewfinder :bsmilie:
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  14. #34

    Default Another Maid abuse child case in singapore......

    Warning: video may be disturbing.

    some reality video to spread the awareness about....to prevent another casualty

    http://singaporeseen.stomp.com.sg/si...t.jsp?id=64592

  15. #35
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    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    Quote Originally Posted by tkbonz View Post
    I helped out in a day care centre with my gf before for a day and i saw the whole day's activities and program.

    What shocked me alot was the lunch... Plain rice with 2 braised chicken wing!!! I had the SAME PORTION as the kids and I almost dieded, some of the kids asked for more wings/rice but there weren't enough...I wanted to refill at least my rice but i refrained and let the kids ate more.

    The child care centre is those void deck types, so its pretty small. If i were to send my kids in the future to child care centre, i would send them to those larger establishments. I'd rather pay more than to make my child suffer.
    Yes, that happens in some childcare centers. But of course, there are others who serve good portions of food to the kids.

    Larger establishments do not mean better or bigger portions of food. Some HDB childcare centers are good.

    All childcare centers have a trial period whereby the parents can accompany their children for a few days and then decide if they want to continue their chilren in the center.

    There are many other things to look out for besides the menu.

  16. #36

    Default Re: Another Maid abuse child case in singapore......

    y some maid is so violent huh cant understand y
    but i see all my relative maid all ok lei
    can any1 answer my doubt???

  17. #37
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    Default Re: Keep an eye on domestic helper.

    Quote Originally Posted by tkbonz View Post
    The parents who subscribed their kids to the day care centre pays money and would be expecting that the child will be well looked after (eg. nutrition in this case). If the kids are instructed to pack extra, whats the point of providing lunch in the first place? The rice + 2 wings is a cost cutting measure, much to my distaste.

    OT alot liao...
    sorry to all...

    these are just in case your "precious" has a bigger appetite? not everyone eats same amount...

    Quote Originally Posted by tkbonz View Post
    Anyway, i believe that if you want to have children, as a parent, you should be the one looking after your own kids. I won't trust a maid to take care of my children. A parent's touch can never compare with a maid's upbringing. If you say you no time to take care of children, then don't even have children in the first place. IMHO.
    parents personally bringing up kids is the gold standard. there is a limit to this "outsource" mindset, responsiblility is key, unless dun mind when old send to old folks home (sorry mum & dad, i got no time )...
    Last edited by sORe-EyEz; 4th April 2009 at 11:42 PM.
    have u seen the "light" yet?

  18. #38

    Default Re: Another Maid abuse child case in singapore......

    Quote Originally Posted by o0darkn3ss0o View Post
    y some maid is so violent huh cant understand y
    but i see all my relative maid all ok lei
    can any1 answer my doubt???
    just have to be in her shoes to know the truth.....only God knows

  19. #39
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    Default Re: Another Maid abuse child case in singapore......

    Quote Originally Posted by chrx82 View Post
    Warning: video may be disturbing.

    some reality video to spread the awareness about....to prevent another casualty

    http://singaporeseen.stomp.com.sg/si...t.jsp?id=64592
    what i do understand is why did the videographer stop the abuse or call the police. instead, he he put in in stomp. from the news, the police wanted to contact the videographer for info.

  20. #40
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    Default Re: Another Maid abuse child case in singapore......

    Errr..I believed this one not in sg lor..

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