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Thread: how to maintain a relationship for long?

  1. #21
    Senior Member egnaro's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    take photograph for her every weekend and make sure it is nicer for every shot... that show you appreciate her a lot.
    Life is like Photography, to improve, you have to keep shooting!

  2. #22

    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    that is one way haha

  3. #23
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    Know when to please, when to give in and when to reason with him/her.
    RICOH GRD I / II / III / IV / GR / GXR

  4. #24
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    no need to find special topic.... sometimes it's just quiet, peaceful.

    no topic does not mean no future. But do nothing in live is really no guarantee your relationship. I believe ppl come together because of something attractive about the other is doing. The things each other doing could be same or totally different.

    and during those quiet time, give and take is really important. Else it might spark negative flame.

    that is my way and still ok.

  5. #25

    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    I am surprised no one mentioned sex.

  6. #26
    Senior Member zac08's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    Quote Originally Posted by Parchiao View Post
    I am surprised no one mentioned sex.
    It's not everything... but it does help
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  7. #27
    Senior Member dennisc's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    Find something mutual to chat about, added advantage if you can chat like one of her gf's (makeups, blogs, guys, etc) as well as your own. Otherwise I'd say you both lacks spark she might not be the one for you.

  8. #28
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    Quote Originally Posted by zac08 View Post
    It's not everything... but it does help
    I actually believe that sex plays an important part in a healthy relationship. I couldn't imagine being with someone where the sex is just straight up bad.
    D∞X, 1-∞ mm F0.17. I like to show off my equipment list because I'm pro. My Flickr

  9. #29
    Senior Member sammy888's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    Quote Originally Posted by entropy_h View Post
    I actually believe that sex plays an important part in a healthy relationship. I couldn't imagine being with someone where the sex is just straight up bad.
    You don't know how close you come to hitting that on the nail! heheheheh... It plays a bigger part then most would dare to let on or admit to themselves.

  10. #30
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    but b4 the sex part, some relationships CMI from start. unless they've been 'hitting it' from the 1st date...

  11. #31
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    Quote Originally Posted by sammy888 View Post
    You don't know how close you come to hitting that on the nail! heheheheh... It plays a bigger part then most would dare to let on or admit to themselves.
    Yeah, I think most Singaporeans are just afraid to admit it, or talk about it. Most people here would say: Oh, there's so much more to a relationship than just sex. And I agree, I do think there is a lot more to it. But I'll be damned if I was forced to be with someone where the sex wasn't good. I don't think the relationship could progress for me at all. I will just have this lingering thought in the back of my head: Oh man, the sex sucks! And most guys are already thinking about sex more often than not. Can you imagine having to think about shitty sex all the time?
    D∞X, 1-∞ mm F0.17. I like to show off my equipment list because I'm pro. My Flickr

  12. #32
    Senior Member sammy888's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    Quote Originally Posted by entropy_h View Post
    Yeah, I think most Singaporeans are just afraid to admit it, or talk about it. Most people here would say: Oh, there's so much more to a relationship than just sex. And I agree, I do think there is a lot more to it. But I'll be damned if I was forced to be with someone where the sex wasn't good. I don't think the relationship could progress for me at all. I will just have this lingering thought in the back of my head: Oh man, the sex sucks! And most guys are already thinking about sex more often than not. Can you imagine having to think about shitty sex all the time?
    why you think I stayed single. heheh...

  13. #33

    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    at the beginnging, everything should feel right for u.. i.e. u must click etc etc.. there must be a LOT of chemistry, the sex must be great etc etc.

    if from the beginning got a lot of issues,t hen i think, long term, is really difficult.

    bt even a relationship with a great start.. after a few years, things will get stale, less topic to talk about . then the killer blow... u meet some hot new colleague at lunch, who makes it clear that she likes u.. and the GRASS WILL ALWAYS BE GREENER.

    this is crunch time for a relationship. if you can get through these "dry" patches, you are set for life. if you always wonder.. if only, or are looking to the horizon, then its game over liow.

    there have been countless books, articles etc written about how to sustain a relationship in the long term. dont act in ignorance. go and read. ask friends. ask your parents. the more information, tips, advice etc that you have, the better you can work at your relationship.

    space is key. you must give each other space to grow and do your own thing. hav ewyour own time out with your friends for your hobbies etc. give her time to do her own thing.

    you must must talk over problems. if the sex is stale, dont just go through the motions. talk to her. im sure she must also be thinking the same thing. experiment. take time to have one special night during a week, where you concentrate on each other, are well rested, have a nice dinner and spent time to have a long lovemaking session. one good session once a week, is bettern than 2 or 3 boring sessions. a good healthy sexual relationship, is a cornerstone of a healthy relationship. dont underestimate it.

    break up the monotony of a relationship in this small country. lets face it. for most of us, things get to be very routine. go to work, go home, see wife/gf. watch tv. go for dinner. ont he weekends, go watch movie, go shopping at orchard vivo city etc etc.

    after a while, confirm sienz.

    make time to do interesting things. things you both have never done (can be anything.. go bowling, go prawn fishing watever). take up a hobby that you both can do... diving, tennis, martial arts, photography. go for events. buy timeout, look for things to do. once a week, alternative giving a nice massage to each other.

    depending on budget, do plan some getaways on a regular basis. doesnt always have to be a week long holiday at some nice resort. even a quick weekend getaway to melacca or KL or something.

    surprise her. girls love surprises. it doesnt have to be expensive gifts. make her dinner. buy her a cupcake. go to the wholesale flower dealers at lornie / thompson road e.g far east. flowers sold there are very very cheap. 20 bucks, can buy a HUGE bunch of lilies.

    just bear it in mind, that nothing comes for free, nothing comes easy. long term relationship IS work. and you BOTH have to work at it. there is no escaping that fact.

  14. #34
    Senior Member Override2Zion's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    Quote Originally Posted by Parchiao View Post
    I am surprised no one mentioned sex.
    Quote Originally Posted by zac08 View Post
    It's not everything... but it does help
    I think both statements are true leh. Good points IMHO. Sex brings a couple closer, but obsession is unhealthy. It takes 2 hands to clap, if either party ain't interest at all, there will be problems. Another factor I feel is important is to trust and also compromise.
    Nikon D200/D700/D800 User :)
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  15. #35
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    me and my gf for 5 year le....
    and we are staying together liao.
    well all i can say abt keeping a relationship long lasting is that always spare a thoought for each other.
    a very important point to note is that not everything u like will be something she like.
    so even when it is something that doesnt interest u and if u have the time to spare just acc her to it and try to know more abt it.
    vice versa get her to do the same too.
    it is not how much time u spent together BUT
    is how much quality time u both spent together.


    one good suggestion is that since u are on cs i belief that have photography as ur interest.
    so why not try to spent more time taking ur own gf pics in this sense ur own personal model.
    than get her to do the viewing with u to select the pics and stuff like that talk abt it and like compliment her here and there abt this view of u is very nice and thing like that.
    Well i belief all girls like to be picture de.....(hahaha my is a pictureholic BIG TIME).....

  16. #36
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    Quote Originally Posted by entropy_h View Post
    I actually believe that sex plays an important part in a healthy relationship. I couldn't imagine being with someone where the sex is just straight up bad.
    Yeah its more than dat! Its about the FOREPLAY

  17. #37

    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    it is just like your camera.

    think about the long term....will u join in the Full Frame series... ?

  18. #38
    Senior Member redstone's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    At times its more of the question of how to start a rs.

  19. #39
    Member terryansimon's Avatar
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    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    isn't that the million dollar question that everybody asks? I don't think there is a one size fits all answer for your predicament, as the individuals involved may vary as greatly from each other; like the variance between sliced cheese and grated cheese. both are cheese (in this case, both are human beings) but both have been manufactured different (in this case, both of your mentalities are different).

    ask yourself what your partner is like, and how is he/she wired. and as much as this is clichéd, communications is the key. if other things make your fancy (like, sex for example), then hope that your partner is on the same wavelength as you.
    chicken fight!

  20. #40

    Default Re: how to maintain a relationship for long?

    Still trying to understand my wife..... sob! sob!

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