View Poll Results: Sabo the groom? OK or not?

Voters
95. You may not vote on this poll
  • Female perspective: It's OK! It's all in the name of fun.

    5 5.26%
  • Female perspective: No, it's not OK.

    3 3.16%
  • Male perspective: It's OK! I'm game for it!

    23 24.21%
  • Male perspective: No, it's not OK.

    64 67.37%
Page 7 of 8 FirstFirst ... 25678 LastLast
Results 121 to 140 of 149

Thread: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

  1. #121

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    Maybe that is why, quite a few of my friends here in Singapore, decided to married oversea.

    I don't blame them.
    deadpoet
    my portfolio

  2. #122

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    I read newspaper somewhere in China the Brothers can Strip and Molest the Jie Meis leh..

  3. #123

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    I read newspaper somewhere in China the Brothers can Strip and Molest the Jie Meis leh..

  4. #124

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    Well, this is already part of the local culture. Like it or not, it is here to stay. It's about the red packet and some fun.

    Some parents object to it as it mess up the timing for the groom to enter the house. But Jia Mei usually has the right to overrule as its their moment as they continued their agenda and go wild. Vulgarities and pushing/fighting can result in the comical mood.

    Many overseas couples do not play this game as these jia meis are not even invited to be there in the morning. Some respect it as a solemn moment to take a lady from her parents' home.

  5. #125
    Member sunboi80's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    West of SG
    Posts
    743

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    The gals will think that if u are willing to go through the harshest "Sabo" for them means how much u love them and willing to do anything for them...
    i think frm the sabo they wan to see how much they are "worth" to their hb bah...
    ;) L-plate Photog: I come, I see, I shoot

  6. #126
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    SGee
    Posts
    1,572

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    still, there is a grain of truth as per thread title- e anti-social aspect of it. if local women can come so far in terms of gender equality, men should not play on as brainless dummies. & pretend its ok (when it sometimes not).

    its gender equality, not battle of e sexes. & marriage is not suff(ring). big day for e couple is not an inititiation to battles ever after.

  7. #127
    vince123123
    Guests

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    Yup, that's one of the measures of "equality" in the anti-gate game tactics Jie Mei's and the bride should be subject to the same kind of humiliation that they want to inflict on the groom and his brothers. hehe

    Quote Originally Posted by Silence Sky View Post
    I read newspaper somewhere in China the Brothers can Strip and Molest the Jie Meis leh..

  8. #128

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture


    Give The Card .. Stop The Sabo!
    Boss say:"Now i shall downgrade u all2 $90 flat for OT!"
    I say:"better ask blanga do..." :bsmilie:

  9. #129

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    I've seen many weddings, from the no-game (meet at church), to games that last 50mins (till I've have to advise them to stop). From a photographer's point of view, some games do actually make it more fun and colourful. I'll find it tasteless once it gets humiliating (such as wearing underwear or bra or stripping). I also FEEL HOT for the groom if he's sweating already in his 2-3layer suit.

    As for other 'traditions', like banquet, waking hours, tea ceremony, it is ultimately a wedding of TWO FAMILIES. Hence usually the parents (usually the Moms!), would want varyign degree of say in the order of the wedding. Many couples lament that banquets are a chore and parents are the one who want them, I'd say do as they please, just for a few hours, and hold your own party with friends if you wish on another time/day.

    Having just gotten married, I've say all went well as to the thread. I made myself very cold in the car, and mange to last ~35mins at the door w/o humiliation, and barely a sweat before seeing the bride. (its the HOT season now!).

    The tradition of a wedding which I"ll not advise against forgoing would be the tea ceremony, where you and your other half gets to meet each other's relatives in a formal setting.

    As for the solemnisation itself, its a personal choice if the couple like to share the moment with any number of family/relatives/friends.

  10. #130
    Senior Member knpan's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    Singapore
    Posts
    3,651

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    all the same...just like when i visit my relatives..they got nothing to say.

    Eat already not?! Wow boy u grown older ! What year are u studying at?! bahh

  11. #131

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    Quote Originally Posted by synapseman View Post
    Yeah! Heard of one case, the groom and his buddies, on hearing the ridiculous demands, all go downstairs and smoke one corner. Mother-in-law panic about the auspicious time, so no choice but to let the fella in simple. Quite steady, I say.

    But to prevent unpleasantness on the day, bride- and groom-to-be must settle and agree on the sabo issue. No last minute surprises, and make sure jiemeis (and the brothers at the end of the dinner banquet) get the idea and give due respect to the requests.
    Cool dude!

  12. #132

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    The amount of humiliation is inversely proportional to how much class the bride has. And class, sadly, has no relation to the amount of education or wealth of the bride. Such activities make the groom look bad on that day, makes the bride look bad from that day.

  13. #133
    Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Mostly SF, Sometimes SGP
    Posts
    424

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    Think I prefer the whole marry a foreigner and skip the sabo thing best

    The funny thing is the few times I have shot a wedding and the guys have done the same door bargaining to the girls when they went to the groom's house, the girls all refused to participate and were in a really bad mood after that. So it seems so hypocritical to me that they expect the guys to be "sporting" but will not do so themselves.

  14. #134

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    Quote Originally Posted by Timber View Post
    The amount of humiliation is inversely proportional to how much class the bride has. And class, sadly, has no relation to the amount of education or wealth of the bride. Such activities make the groom look bad on that day, makes the bride look bad from that day.

    Well said!!!


    Quote Originally Posted by ckuang View Post
    Think I prefer the whole marry a foreigner and skip the sabo thing best

    The funny thing is the few times I have shot a wedding and the guys have done the same door bargaining to the girls when they went to the groom's house, the girls all refused to participate and were in a really bad mood after that. So it seems so hypocritical to me that they expect the guys to be "sporting" but will not do so themselves.
    This I believe has to do with the "princess" mentality many local women have developed. This can be seen as a further manifestation of the "carry gf handbag" syndrome that many guys had unknowingly cultivated. And that is my good nature light hearted interpretation of the whole fiasco. In reality, what I truly believe is the result of a self centered "me me nothing but me" mentality, and the propensity to put down someone in order to raise one's self worth. We see it all the time, not only in social circumstances, but also at work.

    Too bad, so sad.
    deadpoet
    my portfolio

  15. #135

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    And the best part is some women EXPECT to be treated like a PRINCESS when they consistently behave like PEASANTS.

  16. #136

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    Last time at the door of the HDB flat, all her friends lock the main door and don't let us in. Trying to haggle.

    Armed with my own band of Mafia, we all took out our Amex Platinum cards and said "If these cards cannot cut open the door, then maybe we went to the wrong place" and turned around.

    Slowly they open the door and we got in.

  17. #137

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    Quote Originally Posted by Robert View Post
    Last time at the door of the HDB flat, all her friends lock the main door and don't let us in. Trying to haggle.

    Armed with my own band of Mafia, we all took out our Amex Platinum cards and said "If these cards cannot cut open the door, then maybe we went to the wrong place" and turned around.

    Slowly they open the door and we got in.
    Funny, but isn't what happened just very poetic.

    The princess needs amex platinum cards!

    The princess and her gang of thugs wants to play rough, but can be bought!
    deadpoet
    my portfolio

  18. #138
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    SGee
    Posts
    1,572

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    from the many posts thus far seems like local men prefer to see this as a "roll up sleeve & get tough to deal with" situation.

    could it also point to the fact our way of life conditioned most to up the ante in a either "you're with me or against me" attitude? therefore by comparision western cultured men seem more charming (even with similiar level of affluence).

    its tough looking into the mirror when the reflection isn't pretty.

  19. #139
    Member
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    Ipoh. Perak. Malaysia
    Posts
    99

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    Not only this sabo thingy happens in Singapore. The chinese in Malaysia are also doing the same things.

    Being one of the privileged people to capture all that at every wedding, it's fun if the games are not too extreme.

    This is what happen during the preparations by the jiemeis.


    The ingredients:


    The preparation:


    The implementation:

    (Read the meanings on the jobsheet!)

  20. #140

    Default Re: Why ah? S'porean Chinese weddings and the "sabo" culture

    Quote Originally Posted by jetfynn View Post
    Not only this sabo thingy happens in Singapore. The chinese in Malaysia are also doing the same things.

    Being one of the privileged people to capture all that at every wedding, it's fun if the games are not too extreme.

    This is what happen during the preparations by the jiemeis.


    The ingredients:


    The preparation:


    The implementation:

    (Read the meanings on the jobsheet!)
    Glad someone got the evidences.

    Would anyone in their sane mind eat these straight up?

    Mean spirited is what it is. Unable to to relax and enjoy, is a nice way to say it. Finding joy from other people's suffering is more like it!
    deadpoet
    my portfolio

Page 7 of 8 FirstFirst ... 25678 LastLast

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •