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Thread: UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

  1. #1
    Senior Member
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    Talking UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

    Dear IT Support,

    Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and
    noticed a slow down in the overall performance, particularly in
    the flower, gifts and jewellery applications that had operated
    flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

    In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable
    programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but
    installed undesirable programs such as Formula One 5.0, NBA 3.0
    and World Cup 2.0.

    And now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6
    simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to
    fix these problems, but to no avail.

    What can I do?

    Signed,
    Desperate Housewife

    Reply:
    Dear Desperate Housewife,

    First keep in mind:
    Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is
    an operating system.

    Try entering the command C:\ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and
    download
    Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0.

    If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically
    run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

    But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to
    Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Late Night Teh Tarik 6.1.


    Late Night 6.1 is a very bad program that will create
    SnoringLoudly.wav files.

    Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or reinstall
    another
    Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and
    will crash
    Husband 1.0.

    In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a
    limited
    memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.

    You might consider additional software to improve memory and
    performance. I personally recommend Hot Tasty Food 3.0 and
    Tongkat Ali 6.9.

    Good Luck,
    IT Support

  2. #2

    Default Re: UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

    very funny!! hehe...
    whoopieGal:gbounce:
    We're so young and so gone, let's chase the dragon from our home...

  3. #3

    Default Re: UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

    Haha thanks for the sharing.. Funny man..
    Life is like photography, we develop from the negatives.

  4. #4

    Default Re: UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

    good one bro...
    Jerfotography Nikon D300
    Power by iMac MBP iPhone 6+ iPad Air

  5. #5

    Default Re: UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

    lol

    next will be UPGRADE FROM HUSBAND TO FATHER

  6. #6
    Senior Member
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    270 degree of Singapore
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    Default Re: UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

    local version
    Sony Alpha 700 hobbyist

  7. #7
    Senior Member Galdor's Avatar
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    Default Re: UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

    Minolta. Konica Minolta. Sony

  8. #8

    Default Re: UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

    hehehe very old

    one of those things that frequently floats around the army intranet email system

  9. #9

    Default Re: UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

    So funny.

  10. #10
    Member
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    Singapore, Singapore, Singapor
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    Default Re: UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

    As with most sexist jokes, there's a counterpart hehe

    Girlfriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0

    Request for Technical Support, Incident #99-02-14-01

    Last year I upgraded Girlfriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0, and I can find no documentation on several features.

    For example, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization where it monitors all other system activity.

    Applications such as RunAnywhere 10.3 and StayOut 2.5 cause freezes.

    Also, the new program has spawned a couple of unexpected child processes that have taken up a lot of space and resources.

    I was considering going back to Girlfriend 1.0 but there does not seem to be a "revert to previous state" feature.

    Can you help me?

    Registered User #10-1-13-5-19



    Response to User #10-1-13-5-19, Incident #99-02-14-01

    We receive many inquiries to this perceived problem. However it is almost always the result of a common error.

    Many men upgrade from Girlfriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a Utilities & Entertainment program.

    This is a serious misconception.

    Although Wife 1.0 includes many Utilities and Entertainment functions, Wife 1.0 is actually an entire Operating System. It has been designed to run everything.

    Warning! Do not try to: un-install, delete, or purge the program from the system once installed. Trying to un-install Wife 1.0 can be disastrous, resulting in the loss of valuable system resources.

    You can not go back to Girlfriend 1.0. Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this.

    Many have tried "workarounds". These only complicate the situation.

    For example, some have tried to install Girlfriend 2.0 or Wife 2.0 and found the problems persist.

    Others, in an ill conceived attempt, have tried to run Girlfriend 2.0 in the background while Wife 1.0 is running. This almost always results in serious system conflicts, possibly leading to a non-recoverable system crash.

    We recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and adjust a few user input parameters.

    I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Protection Faults (GPFs). Should a GPF occur, the best course of action will be to push the Apologize Button then Reset Button as soon as lock-up occurs.

    The system will run smooth as long as you provide needed maintenance time.

    To free up CPU time and improve performance be certain that you have terminated your several search and scan routines.

    Because each copy of Wife 1.0 is a uniquely configured system, no single manual will cover all enabled features.

    New users should first consult with those who have been running Wife 1.0 for many years before installing a copy yourself. You should consider joining one of our established local users group to discuss your specific configuration.

    Remember, the installation of Wife 1.0 can allow maximum system potential, particularly when used with supplementary applications. For example, killer apps Contentment 2.5 and Reliability 6.12a have been known to max out when run with TLC 2 and Communicator 5.0.

    There are no plans for upgrades; Wife 1.0 was designed to work for a lifetime.

    End of response

  11. #11
    Senior Member afbug's Avatar
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    Aug 2004
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    Planet SG™
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    483

    Default Re: UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

    Aiya install SEDUCE 2.0 and SEX 5.5 can liao la.

    Guys are simple people that require just the basic needs to survive. Food, shelter and sex can liao!

  12. #12

    Default Re: UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

    Quote Originally Posted by theveed View Post
    As with most sexist jokes, there's a counterpart hehe

    Girlfriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0

    Request for Technical Support, Incident #99-02-14-01

    Last year I upgraded Girlfriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0, and I can find no documentation on several features.

    For example, Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other programs and launches during system initialization where it monitors all other system activity.

    Applications such as RunAnywhere 10.3 and StayOut 2.5 cause freezes.

    Also, the new program has spawned a couple of unexpected child processes that have taken up a lot of space and resources.

    I was considering going back to Girlfriend 1.0 but there does not seem to be a "revert to previous state" feature.

    Can you help me?

    Registered User #10-1-13-5-19



    Response to User #10-1-13-5-19, Incident #99-02-14-01

    We receive many inquiries to this perceived problem. However it is almost always the result of a common error.

    Many men upgrade from Girlfriend 1.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that Wife 1.0 is merely a Utilities & Entertainment program.

    This is a serious misconception.

    Although Wife 1.0 includes many Utilities and Entertainment functions, Wife 1.0 is actually an entire Operating System. It has been designed to run everything.

    Warning! Do not try to: un-install, delete, or purge the program from the system once installed. Trying to un-install Wife 1.0 can be disastrous, resulting in the loss of valuable system resources.

    You can not go back to Girlfriend 1.0. Wife 1.0 is not designed to do this.

    Many have tried "workarounds". These only complicate the situation.

    For example, some have tried to install Girlfriend 2.0 or Wife 2.0 and found the problems persist.

    Others, in an ill conceived attempt, have tried to run Girlfriend 2.0 in the background while Wife 1.0 is running. This almost always results in serious system conflicts, possibly leading to a non-recoverable system crash.

    We recommend you keep Wife 1.0 and adjust a few user input parameters.

    I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Protection Faults (GPFs). Should a GPF occur, the best course of action will be to push the Apologize Button then Reset Button as soon as lock-up occurs.

    The system will run smooth as long as you provide needed maintenance time.

    To free up CPU time and improve performance be certain that you have terminated your several search and scan routines.

    Because each copy of Wife 1.0 is a uniquely configured system, no single manual will cover all enabled features.

    New users should first consult with those who have been running Wife 1.0 for many years before installing a copy yourself. You should consider joining one of our established local users group to discuss your specific configuration.

    Remember, the installation of Wife 1.0 can allow maximum system potential, particularly when used with supplementary applications. For example, killer apps Contentment 2.5 and Reliability 6.12a have been known to max out when run with TLC 2 and Communicator 5.0.

    There are no plans for upgrades; Wife 1.0 was designed to work for a lifetime.

    End of response
    Huh... it's a feature, not a bug!??

  13. #13

    Default Re: UPGRADE FROM BOYFRIEND TO HUSBAND (a joke)

    lol.. very funny... more pls!!
    Kodak Easyshare C875
    flickr

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