Why not tell the group of your pain and explain to them why it is required? then go about taking the option of pursuing your dreams?
It would be irresponsible to drop or forsake your commitment to the others to do what you want to do, but with proper arrangement it is possible. As for leaving the country, with Email and video calls, communications are so conveninent now, provided we use them. There's a point in life we must move and making the right arrangement to make it all possible is very crucial.
So rather I think its a matter of how about going to settle the arrangement then to make the decision. If you only think for your whole life, then you would have wasted it. We don't live a 1000yrs, risk it or suck on it.
Life is full of decision, just about everything we do.
You don't live their life for them, neither do they live your life or you.
are you preparing this for your thesis or something?
here's just my impulse comments
- whether the desirability and worthiness of the outcome outweighs/overcomes the probability of eventual regret, both from a self-centred POV and a community-centred POV.
- bottomline is how bad u want it
Who dare to say this in a public forumOriginally Posted by 曹操
Sony Alpha 700 hobbyist
Its more of a "Everyone Air Your Opinion" thing. No arguments on moral high ground or who thinks what shld be what morally or religiously so that each of us can debate within ourselves and consult our own thoughts.
"Let us argue within for the most constant argument lies constantly within" thing.
Also, I'm in the middle of a series of personal writings that hits upon this particular topic as well. Since I'm stuck now at that particular sentence with no way to go on unless I answer this X-Road question myself and provide a satisfactory answer to it and thinking abt it for weeks on the end, and the crowd here's so much matured for a serious discussion, thought I might just pose this question here.
Ok, serious. This line of thought by 曹操 isn't morally wrong as well. I'm still looking out for other personal views including thoughts that fall along this line of argument.
People! Don't be worried about being labelled! Air it! Lets all be open, after all, this is what Photography is training us to be - to seek to see.
Under the hypothetical senario jsbn outlined, it is easy to say, I will suffer, I will sacrifice for the others.
When put into context, the answer is no longer so simple.
At the end of the day, we are primarily resposnible for ourselves. I am extending the defination of ourselves to include our immediate family. Here, I will disagree with most Singaporean, immediate family, I define as our spouse and children only.
So, back to jsbn's delima. If I sacrifice and bear the burden, am I also condeming my wife and children to bear this burden and suffer with me?
Would throwing this bone change anyone's mind?
I think you should narrow down your situation.
Personally, death is nothing. But the mental torture that keeps one from shutting one's eyes is pain beyond death.
my experiences has revealed that there r always painful decisions to make in life. what i've learnt is to choose the better of the 2 evils.
eg. ur dad has a stroke at 80. dr says very risky to operate but its ur consent. will u pull the plug or go ahead with the operation? after operation, if not successful, the end result is to be expected & u tell urself u at least tried. if successful, ur dad suffer a whole great lot from brain damage (can't talk, can't eat, can't walk, etc), on top of it, the family suffers together.
which is ur better of the 2 evils?
another typical scenerio is knowing an unborn baby having down syndrome or some strange diseases, guarantee won't live past 10yrs old after birth, what do u do? let the baby suffer for the next 10yrs with the family or pull the plug b4 its born?
IF my dad had a stroke, he is not able to talk, eat walk or even communicate with us, and is dependent on the machine to keep alive, then I WILL pull the plug. If he can do any of the above, I will not pull the plug. But i will not choose the operation at all, given that situation.
as for the child, I choose not to have him/her to be born into this life.
For Child, pull the plug.
For dad, do everything to save. Cos one day, I would want others to do whatever to save me. If I cannot communicate, already very sad. Even more so if ppl wanna pull my plug and I cannot stop them. Double Whammy man.
What is the fun for staying alive and suffer like that what's more cause other to suffer more also.
Sony Alpha 700 hobbyist
Ok, a view of a situation. Think what you will.
I am with a loved one. We are trapped by a man with a gun.
He say's, "I have one bullet. Either step forward to save the other."
I would stand right where I am.
Why ? .... many reasons.
Starting with selfish. If I am dead, I wont know that the loved one is alive anyway.
Ending with selfish. I won't be around to see the tears for me.
Time, is an effortless construction :)