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Thread: Arranged Marriaged!?!

  1. #1
    Senior Member melvin's Avatar
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    Default Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Hi!
    Recently after the help of the Media helping a lady in her early 40s found her second life, now this,
    Yday read the papers: http://www.tnp.sg/show/story/0,4136,119702,00.html? n a lady in her early 30s seeking Media's help for a Arranged Marriaged considering she is more to western as in thinking but seeking the traditional way of choosing a lifetime Partner.

    Is this the "after effect" of the Media playing the role of matchmaking?
    And the Ladies are initiating! Talking about equallity n Ladies are BRAVE nowadays! or is it?
    Are they slowly taking over the role from them?
    What u GUYS n LADIES think of Arranged Marriaged? Workable in the Y generation?
    Would GUYS LADIES go for one? Considering it is almost 0% of chinese going throu one

  2. #2
    Senior Member Sion's Avatar
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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Arranged marriage will work.

    Mine one is arranged by the heaven.

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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by Sion View Post
    Arranged marriage will work.

    Mine one is arranged by the heaven.

  4. #4

    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Nothing traditional or modern or westernized, right or wrong or good or bad about it. They are just exercising their choice AFAICS.

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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    I don't see anything wrong with seeking help to get married, be it traditional matchmakers or nowadays modern use internet or thru friends and acquintances. It's not how you meet your better half that matters, it's the fact that you meet each other that's more important.

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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Arrange marriage is still far outnumbers love marriage among Indian community, especially in India. No matter how educated is a person, many still follow the tradition. As a result online match-making companies in India (or those run from USA) making tons of money. Its a huge business. Suft and see you will be surprised to see no. of docs, IT ppls, lecturers.
    Arranged worked for Indian, due to involvement of families incase of problems.

    [/B]
    Quote Originally Posted by arpinkor View Post
    I don't see anything wrong with seeking help to get married, be it traditional matchmakers or nowadays modern use internet or thru friends and acquintances. It's not how you meet your better half that matters, it's the fact that you meet each other that's more important.

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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    i believe, all if not most girls would have no problem getting a partner but the criteria they set often put them at a disadvantage... likewise for guys...

    in modern days, if really go for arranged marriage, think would be rather like either desperate, or really cmi...

    response to the article... date so much, yet cannot find a suitable 1... something is obviously wrong...
    Logging Off. "You have 2,631 messages stored, of a total 400 allowed." don't PM me.

  8. #8
    Senior Member azul123's Avatar
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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    In India it is still taboo to marry into a different caste. That explains the statistics.

    ../azul123

  9. #9

    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    this is my own opinion:-

    I read the article and actually found it quite amusing.

    I feel that one of the key factors probably why she hasn't found a lifetime partner is really simply because of the clash of mentality and expectations in her WANTS for a lifelong partner.

    A "westernized" mentality can't really go with a traditional chinese lifestyle so to speak.

    Its like Dr. Jekyl and Mr Hyde. the other aspect is EXPECTATIONS. if one expects this and that and everything to be his/her wants, just be prepared to be disappointed. ultimately its always about COMPROMISE. If the bf doesn't have a certain factor that u EXPECT, issit fatal?

    U can't expect an westernized person to be "Pantang" and vice versa.

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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by plsoong View Post
    this is my own opinion:-

    I read the article and actually found it quite amusing.

    I feel that one of the key factors probably why she hasn't found a lifetime partner is really simply because of the clash of mentality and expectations in her WANTS for a lifelong partner.

    A "westernized" mentality can't really go with a traditional chinese lifestyle so to speak.

    Its like Dr. Jekyl and Mr Hyde. the other aspect is EXPECTATIONS. if one expects this and that and everything to be his/her wants, just be prepared to be disappointed. ultimately its always about COMPROMISE. If the bf doesn't have a certain factor that u EXPECT, issit fatal?

    U can't expect an westernized person to be "Pantang" and vice versa.
    The 1st story featuring the 40 yr old lady was more focused on her unfortunate journey in

    love relationships.

    But this looks like an advertisement for me, recruitment ad perhaps. It would work I believe.

    At least those parties who that can't match her criterion will be detered from

    applying. Would significantly cut down her time on the internet chatroom, chatlines, dating

    agencies and etc..
    Last edited by Static; 18th December 2006 at 01:00 PM.
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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by Static View Post
    .....Would significantly cut down her time on the internet chatroom, chatlines, dating agencies and etc..
    Maybe ClubSnap Kopitiam too?

  12. #12
    Senior Member melvin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by azul123 View Post
    In India it is still taboo to marry into a different caste. That explains the statistics.

    ../azul123
    I use to know some Indian friends from India both from the rural area they seem to have a trend...... that is marrying their own ppl. Normally i will ask them u go back to get married (theirs is arranged) is it girl from next village? Your parents got give u see the picture before? u know her or family? To my surpprise almost 90% will tell me that i marrying my mother's sister's daughter!

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    Member Static's Avatar
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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by melvin View Post
    I use to know some Indian friends from India both from the rural area they seem to have a trend...... that is marrying their own ppl. Normally i will ask them u go back to get married (theirs is arranged) is it girl from next village? Your parents got give u see the picture before? u know her or family? To my surpprise almost 90% will tell me that i marrying my mother's sister's daughter!
    Would the offsprings be normal ?
    陳綺貞 2010 [夏季練習曲] 巡迴演唱會 Cheer Concert 13 Nov 2010 MAX Pavilion@Singapore Expo

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    Senior Member melvin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by plsoong View Post
    this is my own opinion:-

    I read the article and actually found it quite amusing.

    I feel that one of the key factors probably why she hasn't found a lifetime partner is really simply because of the clash of mentality and expectations in her WANTS for a lifelong partner.

    A "westernized" mentality can't really go with a traditional chinese lifestyle so to speak.

    Its like Dr. Jekyl and Mr Hyde. the other aspect is EXPECTATIONS. if one expects this and that and everything to be his/her wants, just be prepared to be disappointed. ultimately its always about COMPROMISE. If the bf doesn't have a certain factor that u EXPECT, issit fatal?

    U can't expect an westernized person to be "Pantang" and vice versa.
    Agree wif u! find it a little contradicting!

  15. #15
    Senior Member melvin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by Static View Post
    Would the offsprings be normal ?
    Some of them show me thier children's pict. seems pretty normal to me but that is oni see pict. duno abt reality

  16. #16
    Senior Member melvin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by arpinkor View Post
    I don't see anything wrong with seeking help to get married, be it traditional matchmakers or nowadays modern use internet or thru friends and acquintances. It's not how you meet your better half that matters, it's the fact that you meet each other that's more important.
    Agreed wif u there is nothing wrong wif arrange marriage, just find the lady a little funny lor westernize but seeking traditional way for life partner some more iirc gt 10 boyfriends!

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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Yes, but you will surprised to see how happy and peaceful is thier married life.
    Indian marriages especially in villages are highly family orieted.
    They marry close relatives as they share the same values , tradition, lifestyle....
    They know very well what is expected from each other. The end result, it's very rare to hear abt divorces in such marriages.

    However it's different story in big cities, especially well to and educated families.

    Quote Originally Posted by melvin View Post
    I use to know some Indian friends from India both from the rural area they seem to have a trend...... that is marrying their own ppl. Normally i will ask them u go back to get married (theirs is arranged) is it girl from next village? Your parents got give u see the picture before? u know her or family? To my surpprise almost 90% will tell me that i marrying my mother's sister's daughter!

  18. #18

    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Waaa...

    I think she asking for too much.

    "I do prefer men who are more Westernised. At the same time, conservative in certain ways.... ...Single men aged between 27 and 45, with sex appeal. She is not ruling out foreigners. Someone who is romantic, a gentleman, well-travelled and knowledgeable would be the icing on the cake."

    When a guy reaches 35, he can go overseas get a bride 1/2 his age.
    When a girl reaches 35, almost no hope already.


    .

  19. #19
    Senior Member melvin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by Caussway View Post
    Yes, but you will surprised to see how happy and peaceful is thier married life.
    Indian marriages especially in villages are highly family orieted.
    They marry close relatives as they share the same values , tradition, lifestyle....
    They know very well what is expected from each other. The end result, it's very rare to hear abt divorces in such marriages.

    However it's different story in big cities, especially well to and educated families.
    Ya... they do have happy family considering the age group which i think quite a gap normally the guy will be in his early 30s and gal will be abt in their late teens to early 20s.

  20. #20
    Senior Member melvin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Arranged Marriaged!?!

    Quote Originally Posted by AReality View Post
    Waaa...

    I think she asking for too much.

    "I do prefer men who are more Westernised. At the same time, conservative in certain ways.... ...Single men aged between 27 and 45, with sex appeal. She is not ruling out foreigners. Someone who is romantic, a gentleman, well-travelled and knowledgeable would be the icing on the cake."

    When a guy reaches 35, he can go overseas get a bride 1/2 his age.
    When a girl reaches 35, almost no hope already.


    .
    Maybe she think she still have time(3yrs) as she is only 32...by that time her expectations will drop if she still cant find her dream man!

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