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Thread: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

  1. #41
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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by melvin View Post
    Seems to be pretty HOT nowadays!
    That you have to ask the analyst.

  2. #42
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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by melvin View Post
    Ya... how sad!

    Maybe it is due to the terms come from the olden days when at that time is zhong nan qing nu, guys dominace thats why the term spinster or diamond bachelor
    olden days? but still widely practiced le.

  3. #43

    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by michhy View Post
    guys in 50s also prefer younger girls/women lar....
    Ya lor...some guys in 50+ ask me to find him a pretty wife of 21 years
    However, these girls are willing to marry them if he's not disabled.

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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by Minlon View Post
    Ya lor...some guys in 50+ ask me to find him a pretty wife of 21 years
    However, these girls are willing to marry them if he's not disabled.
    huh? if he's not disabled? which part?

    how come no 21 years old 1 look for me? i'm enabled...
    Logging Off. "You have 2,631 messages stored, of a total 400 allowed." don't PM me.

  5. #45
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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by Minlon View Post
    Ya lor...some guys in 50+ ask me to find him a pretty wife of 21 years
    However, these girls are willing to marry them if he's not disabled.
    True love can never be diabled. But wallets can.

  6. #46
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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    1) Do our local guys have high expectation?

    human have high expectations, gals also place high expectation on partners


    2) Or is it the ladies have high expectation?

    re pt 1

    3) Is it due to local guys really feel inferior that ladies have higher qualifiation n earning more $ then guys which resulted in above...

    i dun feel inferior , with ladies higher qualifications, just take many people take this opp to look down on people who do not have higher qualification than gf/ spouse

    i like higher qualifications ladies


    4) which in turn resulted guys outsourcing for spouses overseas?

    overseas ladies does gives its own set of problems,
    language, is 1 , if 1 is 2 look for vietnam or mongolia ladies,

    if local gals cannot take fancy in me , i will consider overseas, just like some of my ladies friends prefer ang mos, i also fancy china ladies or japan or korea


    5) Guys like to be commanding like to be above everything n control everything be it in life or in love...etc...

    i m not commanding , love is 2 way , no 1 likes to be commanded forever, 1 only need to act appropratiely at the right time, relinguishing control is also part of a step forward

    6) Do ladies really mind or dun mind guys of a lower qualification n income?


    hmmm , only ladies can answer , i check with my ladies friend thou, its 50-50 weightage on mind or dun mind, for the record , the group that minds holds degree


    7) Is it the demand for equality in the society that ladies wanted to proof that whatever a guy can do they can also or to out perform guys or simply too career minded?(dun misunderstood me its ok to be career minded but not over)

    smart ladies dun seek such proof, its only those that is not smart 1 seeks for such proof.

    when i mean smart , i m referring to the EQ not IQ


    8) Or is it that the Reality over rules True love? (eg:no $ no talk, cost of living, guys must make the first move, being a divorce....et


    if both got money , the relationship will have 1 lesser item to talk abt

    if only either 1 side got money , then this relationship give something to talk abt


    money n love is not together , but linking money with love is shows another layer of wat love can be ,


    1 do not need to love forever to prove thy love, but to show the love while being together makes this relationship mor memorable.

  7. #47
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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by ortega View Post
    it depends on what you are looking for in a spouse

    what is true love?
    The world and its people has to learn what true love is and apply. All the chaos are the result of humans weaknesses. They destroy without feeling and deceive for personal gain. They did not know what is true love.

    People seek fames, status, wealth and the likes and so are for many successful unmarried women. They won't want to marry someone below their status and for many the spouse must have the same beliefs sharing similar interests and hobbies. More often than not because of their ignorant about giving true love they just want to be in control rather than be submissive.

    Here is a passage about True Love from the World Scripture. This kind of true love is not often found in this world but it is important that we should not be ignorant about it.

    -------------------TRUE LOVE------------------

    When the individual realizes Truth and fulfills God's purpose for
    his life, he comes to embody universal love. He delights in the
    well-being of others and selflessly works for their benefit. Love
    or Compassion, being the core of Ultimate Reality, is expressed in
    the love of the saint who can rise above self-centered attachments
    and desires. It is true love, love that is totally committed to the
    welfare of the other. It is love that is universal, overcoming the
    ordinary tendency to self-centeredness or favoritism for one's own.

    The ideal of love requires the foundation of integrity, truthfulness, and
    unity with the Absolute

    The World Scripture describe human love as grounded in divine love: 1 John 4 and 1 Corinthians13 of the Christian Bible, from the Bhagavad Gita, and the Buddhist Metta Sutta. The following passages describe divine love as universal, flowing impartially to all beings, insentient to likes and dislikes.

    True love among humans are from the standpoint of love in the family. On the one hand, as love for children and love for spouse are the most intense of human loves, such love is the standard that should be universally applied to all. Thus a Buddhist sutra states that the bodhisattva loves everyone as though they were a loved only child. On the other hand, even love of family often succumbs to partiality; as the Confucian passage from the Doctrine of the Mean cautions, it is not true love if the personal foundation is not right.

    Beloved, let us love one another; for love is of God, and he who
    loves is born of God and knows God. He who does not love does not
    know God; for God is love.

    No man has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us
    and his love is perfected in us. By this we know that we abide in
    him and he in us, because he has given us of his own Spirit.

    There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear
    has to do with punishment, and he who fears is not perfected in
    love. We love, because he first loved us. If anyone says, "I love
    God," and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love
    his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen.


    [2]1. Christianity. Bible, 1 John 4.7-8, 12-13, 18-20


    The infinite joy of touching the Godhead is easily attained by
    those who are free from the burden of evil and established within
    themselves. They see the Self in every creature and all creation in
    the Self. With consciousness unified through meditation, they see
    everything with an equal eye.


    I am ever present into those who have realized Me in every
    creature. Seeing all life as My manifestation, they are never
    separated from Me. They worship Me in the hearts of all, and all
    their actions proceed from Me. Wherever they may live, they abide
    in Me.


    When a person responds to the joys and sorrows of others as if they
    were his own, he has attained the highest state of spiritual union.


    [3]2. Hinduism. Bhagavad Gita 6.28-32


    If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love,
    I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic
    powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I
    have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am
    nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver my body to be
    burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.


    Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is
    not arrogant or rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is
    not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrong, but
    rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all things,
    hopes all things, endures all things.


    Love never ends; as for prophecies, they will pass away; as for
    tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away. For
    our knowledge is imperfect and our prophecy is imperfect; but when
    the perfect comes, the imperfect will pass away. When I was a
    child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned
    like a child; when I became a man, I gave up childish ways. For now
    we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in
    part; then I shall understand fully, even as I have been fully
    understood. So faith, hope, love abide, these three; but the
    greatest of these is love.


    [4]3. Christianity. Bible, 1 Corinthians 13
    __________________________________________________ ____________


    He who is skilled in welfare, who wishes to attain that calm state
    (Nibbana), should act thus: He should be able, upright, perfectly
    upright, of noble speech, gentle, and humble. Contented, easily
    supported, with few wants and simple tastes, with senses calmed,
    discreet, not impudent, not greedily attached to families....


    [He should always hold this thought,] "May all beings be happy and
    secure, may their hearts be wholesome! Whatever living beings there
    be: feeble or strong, tall, stout or medium, short, small or large,
    without exception; seen or unseen, those dwelling far or near,
    those who are born or those yet unborn--may all beings be happy!"


    Let none deceive another, nor despise any person whatsoever in any
    place. Let him not wish any harm to another out of anger or
    ill-will. Just as a mother would protect her only child at the risk
    of her own life, even so, let him cultivate a boundless heart
    towards all beings. Let his thoughts of boundless love pervade the
    whole world: above, below, and across without any obstruction,
    without any hatred, without any enmity. Whether he stands, walks,
    sits or lies down, as long as he is awake, he should develop this
    mindfulness. This, they say, is the noblest living here.


    [5]4. Buddhism. Sutta Nipata 143-151, Metta Sutta


    Now, I am jealous of no one,
    Now that I have attained unto the Society of the Saints:
    I am estranged with no one: nor is anyone a stranger to me,
    Indeed, I am the friend of all.
    All that God does, with that I am pleased;
    This is the wisdom I have received from the saints.
    Yea, the One God pervades all: and, seeing Him,
    I am wholly in bloom.


    [6]5. Sikhism. Adi Granth, Kanara, M.5, p. 1299


    Compassion is a mind that savors only
    Mercy and love for all sentient beings.


    [7]6. Buddhism. Nagarjuna, Precious Garland 437


    That one I love who is incapable of ill will, who is friendly and
    compassionate.


    [8]7. Hinduism. Bhagavad Gita 12.13


    If, like a cracked gong, you silence yourself, you have already
    attained Nibbana: no vindictiveness will be found in you.


    [9]8. Buddhism. Dhammapada 134
    __________________________________________________ ____________

    A man is a true Muslim when no other Muslim has to fear anything
    from either his tongue or his hand.

    [10]9. Islam. Hadith of Bukhari


    To the addict, nothing is like his dope;
    to the fish, nothing is like water:
    But those immersed in the love of God feel love for all things.


    [11]10. Sikhism. Adi Granth, Wadhans, M.1, p. 557


    Then that do we choose, O Lord of Wisdom, O beautiful Truth, that
    do we think, do we speak, and do we practice, which shall be best
    of the actions of living ones for both worlds!


    [12]11. Zoroastrianism. Avesta, Yasna 35.3


    Hillel said, "Be of the disciples of Aaron--one that loves peace,
    that loves mankind, and brings them nigh to the Law."


    [13]12. Judaism. Mishnah, Abot 1:12


    Have benevolence towards all living beings, joy at the sight of the
    virtuous, compassion and sympathy for the afflicted, and tolerance
    towards the indolent and ill-behaved.


    [14]13. Jainism. Tattvarthasutra 7.11


    Of the adage, Only a Good Man knows how to like people, knows how
    to dislike them, Confucius said, "He whose heart is in the smallest
    degree set upon Goodness will dislike no one."


    [15]14. Confucianism. Analects 4.3-4


    Strong One, make me strong.
    May all beings look on me with the eye of friend!
    May I look on all beings with the eye of friend!
    May we look on one another with the eye of friend!


    [16]15. Hinduism. Yajur Veda 36.18
    __________________________________________________ ____________


    Wadhans 1.1: This is a good test of whether an emotion is godly
    love or ordinary love. Godly love is all-embracing, while ordinary
    love focuses on one object exclusively, thereby inciting jealousy.
    Godly love seeks to benefit others, while ordinary love is tinged
    with selfish desire. Cf. Asa-ki-Var 21.1, p. 1000; Sun Myung Moon,
    9-11-77, p. 274.
    __________________________________________________ ____________


  8. #48
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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    40 for ladies is really kinda hard.
    If the guy wants a kid, most likely the lady will not be a target.

    Guys go for looks first. If they like the look, then they make the initiative to know the lady. If one is 40, and looks 40, I think think guys will be attractive visually. First criteria cannot make it already, the guys will turn around.

  9. #49

    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by Parka View Post
    40 for ladies is really kinda hard.
    If the guy wants a kid, most likely the lady will not be a target.

    Guys go for looks first. If they like the look, then they make the initiative to know the lady. If one is 40, and looks 40, I think think guys will be attractive visually. First criteria cannot make it already, the guys will turn around.
    Being rich helps a lot... many guys would be glad to date a rich woman. I know of one who courted and dating a ceo of a local SME. His main aim? Her dollars...

  10. #50
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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Indeed it's true. Ladies over 40 have a hard time finding a mate. Men over 40 can still get married. However men over40 will have a hard time getting a job.

  11. #51
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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by jbma View Post
    Indeed it's true. Ladies over 40 have a hard time finding a mate. Men over 40 can still get married. However men over40 will have a hard time getting a job.
    MBA (Married But Available), funny thing, got more gfs then when I was young?

  12. #52
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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by centuryegg View Post
    Being rich helps a lot... many guys would be glad to date a rich woman. I know of one who courted and dating a ceo of a local SME. His main aim? Her dollars...
    Being rich may or may not help.
    If you're rich, you'll spend most of the time wondering is the person is after your money or your love.

  13. #53
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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by centuryegg View Post
    Being rich helps a lot... many guys would be glad to date a rich woman. I know of one who courted and dating a ceo of a local SME. His main aim? Her dollars...
    liddat rich cannot, poor oso cannot? den how?

  14. #54
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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by Del_CtrlnoAlt View Post
    huh? if he's not disabled? which part?

    how come no 21 years old 1 look for me? i'm enabled...
    urs diff mount? mayb hers is Pentax?

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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    It seems strange to me that people who are nice-looking and who are successful would have a problem finding a soul-mate. Have you ever considered that there may be some strange quirk in their character that makes them difficult to get along with? After all, relationships are built along the lines of give and take aren't they? And trust. Just look around at the many, many people who are a LOT less attractive and have no great success to speak of - yet most of them are happily married or in stable relationships...

  16. #56

    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    3) Is it due to local guys really feel inferior that ladies have higher qualifiation n earning more $ then guys which resulted in above...
    Personally, I feel that some guys do get intimidated by ladies with higher qualification or earning power. From my experience, when guys know that my major is in Psychology, they tend to clam up and feel 'smaller'. Or maybe it is a field in which people in general do not have a very good understanding of.


    6) Do ladies really mind or dun mind guys of a lower qualification n income?
    I personally would not mind..

    7) Is it the demand for equality in the society that ladies wanted to proof that whatever a guy can do they can also or to out perform guys or simply too career minded?(dun misunderstood me its ok to be career minded but not over)
    Society has changed that women no longer need to stay at home and be a housewife. There are now "house-bands" (husbands) who stay home, take care of the kids & house. If my income is able to sustain the both of us and perhaps, a family, I don't see it being a problem. However, it may be a problem to some guys' ego and pride as being seen as a "house-band".

    Then again.. Everybody has their own definition of being "too career-minded".

    Last edited by cityofangels; 16th November 2006 at 04:10 PM.

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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by Robbie J View Post
    It seems strange to me that people who are nice-looking and who are successful would have a problem finding a soul-mate. Have you ever considered that there may be some strange quirk in their character that makes them difficult to get along with? After all, relationships are built along the lines of give and take aren't they? And trust. Just look around at the many, many people who are a LOT less attractive and have no great success to speak of - yet most of them are happily married or in stable relationships...
    True... i'm blessed to be normal... as normal as i do seem abnormal...
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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by sORe-EyEz View Post
    urs diff mount? mayb hers is Pentax?
    i'm going to change to M42 mount, and allow girls to use adaptors on me...
    Logging Off. "You have 2,631 messages stored, of a total 400 allowed." don't PM me.

  19. #59

    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by Robbie J View Post
    It seems strange to me that people who are nice-looking and who are successful would have a problem finding a soul-mate. Have you ever considered that there may be some strange quirk in their character that makes them difficult to get along with? After all, relationships are built along the lines of give and take aren't they? And trust. Just look around at the many, many people who are a LOT less attractive and have no great success to speak of - yet most of them are happily married or in stable relationships...
    It is because they are so into over themselves..... The case I put across earlier of the CEO? Well she chose the younger chap because he was sauve and good looking and frankly she knew nothing about him. She just knew that he looked good next to her. Another girl I know, a c*** teaser who used to hang out in one very popular night spot. She was so "popular" that she knew everyone there. However she was always after "Mr Perfect" hence always dating the handsome players... in the end get dumped, go with another, get dumped go with another.

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    Default Re: Ladies above 40 difficult to find true love???

    Quote Originally Posted by Del_CtrlnoAlt View Post
    i'm going to change to M42 mount, and allow girls to use adaptors on me...
    M42 = screw mount ?

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