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Thread: Thought to Ponder.....

  1. #1
    Senior Member
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    Default Thought to Ponder.....

    Dear All,

    This is something that was sent to me so i thought it might be fun to share this with everyone. Do take it with a pinch of salt.

    Thought to Ponder.....
    Can you cry under water?

    How important does a person have to be before they are considered
    assassinated instead of just murdered?

    Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny
    for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

    Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were
    buried in for eternity?

    Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

    What disease did cured ham actually have?

    How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be
    a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

    Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up
    like every two hours?

    If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

    Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

    Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in
    binoculars to look at things on the ground?

    Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you
    naked anyway.

    Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural

    Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible
    crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

    If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about
    him?

    Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

    If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut,
    why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

    Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're
    both dogs!

    If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
    vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

    Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same
    tune?

    Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

    Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but
    call it a haemorrhoid when it's in your butt?

    End...
    --
    "High Wired, Dream Sired"

  2. #2
    Senior Member jOhO's Avatar
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    Default Re: Thought to Ponder.....

    hehe nice one.. i didn't know or realise that the two songs were the same!

  3. #3
    Member Static's Avatar
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    Default Re: Thought to Ponder.....

    Thought to Ponder.....
    Can you cry under water?

    Ans: Yes


    How important does a person have to be before they are considered
    assassinated instead of just murdered?

    Ans: When he doesn't know who killed him


    Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny
    for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

    Ans: You comments are worth more than what's on someone else head.

    Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were
    buried in for eternity?

    Ans: No idea, cuz i am still alive


    Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

    Ans: Its more exp and troublesome to provide round boxes

    What disease did cured ham actually have?
    Ans: No idea

    How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be
    a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
    Ans: The wheel was invented during the cave era, spaceship was much much later.


    Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up
    like every two hours?
    Ans: Read somewhere. Baby can sleep for more than 10hours, they only wake up when hungry

    If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
    Ans: The others are not deaf lar

    Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
    Ans: English langauge dude.

    Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in
    binoculars to look at things on the ground?
    Ans: U get to have a bird eye view from the top bro.

    Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you
    naked anyway.
    Ans: Its erotic to see someone undressing. U dun want an erected guy to operate on u right ?

    Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural
    Ans: Ya hor, why ? 2 Breasts = bra, 1 ** = panties

    Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible
    crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
    Ans: Different bread are of different make, some needs a longer time to toast

    If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about
    him?
    Ans: Sori never hear b4

    Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
    Ans: Chim dunnoe

    If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut,
    why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
    Ans :

    Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're
    both dogs!
    Ans: I am getting stupid trying to come up wif an answer


    If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
    vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
    Ans: Baby oil is for babies ?


    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
    Ans: Dumb qtn bro

    Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same
    tune?
    Ans: Yes

    Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
    Ans: Nope, recall in my head can liao

    Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but
    call it a haemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
    Ans: Finally last qtn liao

    End...[/QUOTE]
    陳綺貞 2010 [夏季練習曲] 巡迴演唱會 Cheer Concert 13 Nov 2010 MAX Pavilion@Singapore Expo

  4. #4
    Moderator ortega's Avatar
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    Default Re: Thought to Ponder.....

    Can you cry under water?
    Yes

    How important does a person have to be before they are considered
    assassinated instead of just murdered?
    Dunno

    Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny
    for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
    exchange rates

    Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were
    buried in for eternity?
    Dunno

    Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
    Cheaper to make a suare box

    What disease did cured ham actually have?
    Dunno

    How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be
    a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
    because we got lazy later

    Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up
    like every two hours?
    it is the look of a baby sleeping that is important here

    If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
    the judge will still hear

    Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
    Dunno

    Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in
    binoculars to look at things on the ground?
    Birds Eye view, also normally i looks at far away stuff, not stuff on the 1st floor

    Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you
    naked anyway.
    the act of undressing is erotic

    Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural
    good question

    Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible
    crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
    some people like to burn their toast and scrape off the burn part b4 eating

    If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about
    him?
    Sorry i also never heard that song

    Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
    Still must pay ERP

    If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut,
    why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
    if he fixed the boat, then it willbe the end of the show

    Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're
    both dogs!
    Pluto is a dog while goofy is a charecter

    If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
    vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
    Babies?

    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
    Moral code

    Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same
    tune?
    Sounds like it

    Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
    because i need to know if it sounds the same

    Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but
    call it a haemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
    dunno

  5. #5
    tripnine
    Guests

    Default Re: Thought to Ponder.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Wolfgang

    Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but
    call it a haemorrhoid when it's in your butt?

    End...
    Because it looks very much like somebody else's ass from up there and
    it sure would bleed a lot if you stick something on it up yours

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Thought to Ponder.....

    Quote Originally Posted by Wolfgang

    Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same
    tune?



    End...
    dun forget baa baa black sheep
    give me a pen, and i'll give you my signature

  7. #7
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: Thought to Ponder.....

    Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?

    This is interesting. I suppose not.

    Car pool lanes are to benefit 2 or more people who could have been driving separate cars but chose to share one car instead. I heard a discussion on radio about whether a parent driving a child should be eligible to drive in the carpool lane or not. The argument was that since the kid could not drive by himself anyway, so there was no reduction in the number of cars on the road, and thus they should not be eligible. The traffic police on the radio answered that in principle that was right, but to simplify the law it was simply implemented as 2 or more person regardless of age (as long as the driver has a valid driver's license).

    I believe both persons in the vehicle should at least be alive to be eligible...
    As complexity rises, precise statements lose meaning and meaningful statements lose precision.

  8. #8
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: Thought to Ponder.....

    Thats pretty good actually, cheers for sharing

  9. #9
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: Thought to Ponder.....

    Dear All,

    This is something that was sent to me so i thought it might be fun to share this with everyone. Do take it with a pinch of salt.

    Thought to Ponder.....
    Can you cry under water?
    Ans: yes

    How important does a person have to be before they are considered
    assassinated instead of just murdered?
    Ans: when u have bodyguard to block bullets for u

    Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny
    for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
    Ans: Well, u know when people ask u things, u always a bit more reserved than u volunteer ur info?

    Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were
    buried in for eternity?
    Ans: If i am in heaven, clothes doesnt matter :O but then if u are in hell, the clothes probably will be burnt!

    Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
    Ans: very simple, helps u take it out. It doesnt matter for SPAM (the meat) but it matters for pizza if you have to flip it over to take it out! lol

    What disease did cured ham actually have?
    Ans: prevents rotting

    How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be
    a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
    Ans: well, i guess NASA focus on the "big picture"! lol, you dont expect them to focus on wheels on luggage huh?

    Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up
    like every two hours?
    Ans: yeah, but if u add it up... i'll be very contented!

    If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
    Ans: No answer.

    Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
    Ans: One is a past event and the other supposed to be LIVE

    Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in
    binoculars to look at things on the ground?
    Ans: person who ask this is not a photographer:P lol

    Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you
    naked anyway.
    Ans: lawsuits.. they cant be seen to be removing the clothes

    Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural
    Ans: whoever ask this question is kinda dumb... there's "panty"

    Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible
    crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
    Ans: They just promise to TOAST, not elidiblility! kinda reminds me when nikon sold me the camera!

    If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about
    him?
    Ans: same reason as why i am answering questions like this.. bored.

    Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
    Ans: sure. not sure anyone wanna pick up though.

    If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut,
    why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
    Ans: lol... time for some cross-training...

    Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're
    both dogs!
    ans: thats why he looks goofy and is called goofy!

    If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
    vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
    ans: yeah, baby! (best austin power impersonation possible!)

    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
    Ans: no answer for that... question is moronic

    Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same
    tune?
    Ans:Yes

    Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
    Ans:yes

    Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but
    call it a haemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
    ans... eh.. i dont have any answer for this!


    End...

    My feeble attempt! Enjoy!

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