*woot woot!*cheers & whistles!* bravo bravo!Originally Posted by cannonball
*woot woot!*cheers & whistles!* bravo bravo!Originally Posted by cannonball
it chills my heart to see how some people do not have the capacity to empathize, to have the ability to feel what another being is feeling or thinking.Originally Posted by photobum
Feeling what other feel
Empathy is the ability to not only detect what others feel but also to experience that emotion yourself.
This can be both a bane and a boon. If you can read another person's emotions then you can both avoid making a faux pas and also utilize their state to move them in another direction. When people are in emotional states their ability to decide is often significantly impaired. Thus you cannot expect aroused people to make rational choices at this time.
Empathy is a bane if you end up experiencing all the bad feelings of everyone around you. This is one of the problems that therapists and other carers have to handle.
It's not sympathy
Empathy and sympathy are very close and are sometimes used as synonyms. The easiest way to separate them is to remember that empathy is about feelings whilst sympathy is about actions. Thus you may empathize with another person and then act on this by telling them how sorry or happy you feel for them.
Empathetic people are often very sympathetic - they can hardly stop themselves as they really do feel for the other person.
A person who is sympathetic but empathetic may appear a little shallow, as they are less likely to show an emotional connection. 'Terribly sorry and all that, old chap' they might say, in a friendly but relatively cold voice.
It's definitely not psychopathy
A defining element of a psychopath is that they do not and probably cannot empathize with other people. They are often good at imitating this, but in doing so they are using it in a cold and manipulative way.
This lack of empathy is one thing that makes a psychopath so dangerous. If we cannot empathize with others then we are unlikely to care about them. Psychopaths can this easily objectify other people, treating them like 'things' and even killing them without any remorse.
It has many benefits
The value of empathy comes not from understanding the other person's feelings, but what you do as a result of this.
Empathy connects people together
When you empathize with me, my sense of identity is connected to yours. As a result, I feel greater in some way and less alone. I may well, as a result, also start to empathize more with you.
In a therapeutic situation, having someone else really understand how you feel can be a blessed relief, as people with emotional problems often feel very much alone in their different-ness from other people. The non-judgmental quality can also be very welcome.
Therapeutically, it can be a very healing experience for someone to empathize with you. When someone effectively says 'I care for you', it also says 'I can do that, I can care for myself.'
Empathy builds trust
Empathy displayed can be surprising and confusing. When not expected, it can initially cause suspicion, but when sustained it is difficult not to appreciate the concern. Empathy thus quickly leads to trust.
Empathy closes the loop
Consider what would happens if you had no idea what the other person felt about your communications to them. You might say something, they hated it, and you continued as if they understood and agreed. Not much persuasion happening there!
The more you can empathize, the more you can get immediate feedback on what they are experiencing of your communications with them. And as a consequence, you can change what you are saying and doing to get them to feel what you want them to feel.
relax guys. it's just a troll at work. give him/her/it what he/she/it wants, and you fall into his/her/its trap. and only adds to his/her/its enjoyment.
it will go away when nobody feeds it.
Well, HS also kenna dismembered....
"we live to serve a purpose" ..... may i know what is YOUR purpose for living?Originally Posted by photobum
always the Light, .... always.
Originally Posted by photobum
um.. if i saw a real man shot dead right in front of my eyes, i would think life is so fragile. I wouldn't think life is cheap.
Let's say, for example, a man had raised his child to become a successful person (in business or education), but during the upbringing of his child he had fought lots of hardship. And one day, his child was brought to dead by an accident in front of his own eyes. Do you think he would say "Life is cheap"?
He would probably say "Life is so fragile. I had worked hard all my life to bring up my child to this stage but just in a blink of my eyes, he has gone."
Swee!Originally Posted by zeith
looking thru at this topic, i propose the mods or admin setup a sub forum or forum solely for discussion of serious topics and each week, a certain topic is raised and discussions go on for a week.
[QUOTE=dan_1337;2947523]if it was painted white, it would cost twice as much as Sigma =P[QUOTE]
if you think its that great to emphatise with just a mere cat then go ahead and spend your life emphatising all you want. its ok to come here to mention that you are sad that cats are treated in such-n-such a manner that but there is no need to admonish and preach all over other people who do not emphatise as much as you do or choose not to emphatise at all. afterall, they are free to say and /or do what they want. whether other people emphatise as much has the cats at all, its entirely up to them to choose. and for the part that human life is cheap, come think of it, its quite true. if its so expensive then why are there so many humans in earth? cheap things will always outnumber expensive things. i doubt that you have lived long enough to fully realise what life means. i dont even think that you have enough life experience so as to come across people who are so atrocious that really, they dont even deserve to be born in the first place. do you really think life is that great? do you really think all your high and mighty preaching about emphathy will get you anywhere? save it for yoursef, or at least for some person who meets your standards of emphathy, which, frankly, will not exist in large numbers in the first place. and that brings me to the point: please snap out of it. when you are old enough, you will start to realise the real meaning of emphathy. yeah yeah go ahead and scold me and the rest that you do not see fit. still, i give you one more advise: grow up for a few more years, then come back and tell us what emphathy really means.Originally Posted by furrypaws
ps. any feedback on croc meat?
Erm, care to use paragraph breaks? Thanks ah.Originally Posted by user111
And he even showcased my brains on Clubsnap!! Talking about gross!.........Originally Posted by Bobman
Sion, give me back my brains! Or else, I will visit you in Sydney.....
dont like? then dont read. simple. and no need to roll eyes. no need to be sarcastic. next person who comes and piss me off, i will continue to scold. i dont care who he is. end of story. want to complain? want to get me deregistered? go ahead. after all, if some idiots who insult me and refuse to admit and refuse to apologise can get re-registered, i also dont see the point of logic and justice, much less to come here and wake people up from their delusion of so-called emphathy. good night.
Wah! you are really angry! take it easy lah! If you don't like it, why read the thread at all anyway.......just skip it, and read other threads you like lah!Originally Posted by user111
i dont care anymore. this world sux.
in this world, there are a lot of disappointing things. a lot of people dont listen. a lot of people never wake up. a lot of people get away with evil. a lot of people get mistaken with wrong ideas. come think of it, scolding is also of not much use. just let them perish on their own. if they can help themselves then all the better. makes my life so much easier. good night.
Originally Posted by user111
Whatever mate, anything that rocks your boat. It's just words on the screen to most of us but if you wanna take it personal and start scolding, knock yourself out.
Yes I AM rolling my eyes again cos I personally think you've taken it all in the wrong context.
Tsk tsk, such anger and inner rage. I wonder when you'll actually see the real world for what it is. Why? Just cos the world doesn't empathise with you it means everything else is undeserving of empathy? Reminds me of a tantrum throwing child.Originally Posted by user111
I sense some empathy (he he ) for the world at large in your words, don't give up, hope you will find some peace soon.Originally Posted by user111
You can not change the world, nor other people, but you can start changing yourself for the good.......there is no need to be so negative, and give up on others. All you can do is do your part in this world, as long as you don't harm others. Be an example to others, and all you can hope, is that you will be some inspiration to others.
I feel sad for the person who killed that cat too, what kind of anger and rage was inside that person? Did the cat annoy him/her? Or was it just a matter of fullfilling their 'desires'?
Hong Sien the Psycho Psychiater
pardon my ignorance and low iq but what pissed you off and what made you upset? A discussion is on about the dismemberment of a kitten. You keep asking about the flavours of exotic meat. Someone write about empathy and you let go about people offending you and all and asking people to grow up before talking about empathy.
Mmmmm exactly who is supposed to get upset and over what? Im really quite confused.
My personal feelings and well I dont ask anyone to agree and yes this is a forum, each to his own. I think the whole issue has been about the treatment of an life, be it human or non human. Nothing to do about whether one eats cows and yet say that eating of dogs are double standard. Its more about the psychological aspect of a person when he decides to dismember a kitten for purposes unknown but defintely not for food.
When we condone such an act and say "What's the big deal?? Its only a cat!" As they say when one has such callous attitude to life then one will not hestitate to do that to an fellow human and nature as a whole. The Japanese during WW2 did horrific experiments on human subjects, reasoning why they could stomach it was because the same rational "What's the big deal? Its only a maruta(Japanese for log, which is what they called the human subjects) The scientists that did those experiments didnt regard the non japanese prisoners as human but non human and hence the go ahead with experiments.
The British during the colonization of Australia decided that the local aboriginal people were comparable to animals and proceeded to shoot them like animals. Whole tribes hunted down by hunters with hunting dogs and shot.
And one does not need to go into details of the Jewish Holoclaust.
Not digging up old history but I personally believe Humans have only that fine line between being man and beast. Cross that line and we with our intelligence and inability to show empathy for our fellow man and fellow living things will very well destroy everything.
Well said...centuryegg & hongsien
I was equally confused about his "pissed" at the human's kind nature attitude too...
Last edited by cannonball; 31st July 2006 at 12:42 PM.
Eikin...I agree with you that life is fragile. Brings back a lot of sad memories.Originally Posted by eikin
Seriously... photobum, you really need to do some reflections first before making your statement about life is cheap, as once it is lost, you will never get it back. May peace be with you...
what can you say if some people choose to let themselves be jaded and lose all form of empathy?
It's their loss.
We live in an age when unnecessary things are our only necessities. - Oscar Wilde