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Thread: Is this normal?

  1. #1
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    Default Is this normal?

    I don't like to spend time lurking in nightspots or drinking excessively with peers(even once every blue moon). Now my cycle of friends has dwindled........Some how I just want the 'boring' life that dreaded by the people around me.

    Is having a disciplined lifestyle no longer an acceptable part of socialising in a bustling city? Are karaoke, disco or pubbing till wee hours of the morning the only popular means of wheeling and dealing(buliding contacts) in the business world?

    Sorry I have to ask this, coz I am clueless due to voluntarily jobless for the past three years.

    Any comments are welcome. Thanks

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Is this normal?

    I hear you . It's sad but true. With the ever increasing commercial pressure, morality is just a foot note nowadays.

    Sorry, can;t really help you on this. Only can agree with your views

    DT

  3. #3

    Default Re: Is this normal?

    I have a few friends who club and a few who dont. While i agree that i may not have such a wide social circle I think the quality matters more
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  4. #4

    Default Re: Is this normal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Benign
    I don't like to spend time lurking in nightspots or drinking excessively with peers(even once every blue moon). Now my cycle of friends has dwindled........Some how I just want the 'boring' life that dreaded by the people around me.

    Is having a disciplined lifestyle no longer an acceptable part of socialising in a bustling city? Are karaoke, disco or pubbing till wee hours of the morning the only popular means of wheeling and dealing(buliding contacts) in the business world?

    Sorry I have to ask this, coz I am clueless due to voluntarily jobless for the past three years.

    Any comments are welcome. Thanks
    Hi, what do you mean by "voluntarily jobless" and "disciplined lifestyle"?

  5. #5

    Default Re: Is this normal?

    In the business world, if you have the honey, the bees will come. If you are drained, the bees will dump.

    I beg to differ that building business contacts (in singapore) have to resort to clubbing. Clubbing is just one avenue to strenghten contacts. It is one way to wind down with a cold beer after a tough week or day. But from what i know and experienced, I dun usually meet clients there or is there a need to bring them there. Singapore, in my opinion, has a very disciplined way of doing business and getting deals done. Clubbing and nite clubbing (with prostitution) is just a good to have and is sometimes dependent on the trade we are in. For eg., wholesale biz in telco used to be one of them, but no longer the scene/requirement in recent years - thanks to new entrants in the game.

    In North Asia, it can be a totally different ball game. Deal signing (as in multimillion $) has a very close relationship with clubbing and night clubbing. Again, I may generalise here, but usually is decided by the client. Rejecting such requests can have the contract torn up and returned to sender in the more severe cases.

    We are lucky we are in singapore as we do not have to spend the thousands for "high end" entertainment for most trades. Also, we can have better family and individual time at home. But some Singaporeans might have also been conditioned 'wrongly' when they (eventually) meet north Asian clients and have to clinch deals with them. I had worked closely with Taiwanese and Chinese before and clinched deals with them and for them. Feedbacks i usually get is, "sometimes, we feel sorry for some Singaporeans that they do lack exposure in 'extreme' PR and entertainment." I am one of them who lacks the wild factor and hell to them as I do feel fortunate in a way. I have a higher quality of life when i see them drunk at least twice a week as part of the job requirement.

    In the end, this is the way we are and the way we do business here. Haha, it's our turn to tell them, "Sorry, I aint going to the pub! Go back to your hotel and sleep lah."

    Cheers

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Is this normal?

    I think you are suffering from depression, see a psychiatrist. Did I spell correctly?

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Is this normal?

    Hi, what do you mean by "voluntarily jobless" and "disciplined lifestyle"?

    "Voluntarily jobless" means I ceased earning and start pawning whatever left on the shelves lor. At that point, I just felt I need a break lor........

    "Disciplined lifestyle" ? Living and doing those boring things like trying to sleep early, drink and smoke less etc etc....... "Good habits" ?



    I don't know whether it is my fate line mah So, you smart alecks might provide some insights about this ever changing world.
    Look like I might as well making myself redundant again.....


  8. #8

    Default Re: Is this normal?

    Quote Originally Posted by dreamtheatre
    I hear you . It's sad but true. With the ever increasing commercial pressure, morality is just a foot note nowadays.

    Sorry, can;t really help you on this. Only can agree with your views

    DT

    i think we have to be careful with our choice of words here, clubbing is by no means non-ethical, or as you suggest, lacking in moral......it's just different life style, I have friends who go KTV alot , and i don't like the lifestyle, so we are falling further apart, but I have friends whom like to have a few drinks in a quitet pub, and that's my cup of tea (or beer), so it's about birds of the same feather flocking together.....

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Is this normal?

    I think you are suffering from depression, see a psychiatrist. Did I spell correctly?

    Oh NO......... Can I have her no. ?

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Is this normal?

    seems like u r d few who shun d "Great S'pore Rat Race", prefer a diff lifestyle?

    ppl who make u feel like there's something wrong w/ u but u dun hav 2. there's nothing wrong, it's jus tt u r diff from d majority.

    u r depress b-cos ur frds r (or seem 2 b) drifting away from u, feel abit uncertain as 2 y tis is happening bah.
    it also may jus b a passing phase u r going through.

    i oso liddat. abit mountain turtle... ....


    *there's strength in solitude*

  11. #11
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    Default Re: Is this normal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Nikonnew
    i think we have to be careful with our choice of words here, clubbing is by no means non-ethical, or as you suggest, lacking in moral......it's just different life style, I have friends who go KTV alot , and i don't like the lifestyle, so we are falling further apart, but I have friends whom like to have a few drinks in a quitet pub, and that's my cup of tea (or beer), so it's about birds of the same feather flocking together.....

    opps, I was taking the generic 'mood' of Benign's post. The last thing I want to do is to put 'labels' on ppl.

    Sorry if I offended anyone.

    DT

  12. #12

    Default Re: Is this normal?

    Bro Benign

    Dun feel so down and out. I think u should focus on your strength. Build your portfolio (whatever trade u were in before or whatever interest u have now). If u need networking, there are plenty floating around and the mid and higher end social circle. Most are free and u can just build your contacts from there. But first, u have to have something u want to achieve and that u are good in.

    Some self help books from Library might put u back on track in the business/social ring.

    Just a suggestion here, but pls correct if i have misunderstood your intent in posting.

    Cheers

  13. #13
    Senior Member Pablo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is this normal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Benign
    "Voluntarily jobless" means I ceased earning and start pawning whatever left on the shelves lor. At that point, I just felt I need a break lor........

    "Disciplined lifestyle" ? Living and doing those boring things like trying to sleep early, drink and smoke less etc etc....... "Good habits" ?



    I don't know whether it is my fate line mah So, you smart alecks might provide some insights about this ever changing world.
    Look like I might as well making myself redundant again.....

    Suggestion:

    Start with changing your attitude.
    Time, is an effortless construction :)

  14. #14
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    Default Re: Is this normal?

    if you dont like to club with your friends, other than once in a blue moon, care to share how you spend your free time?

    I dont think its abnormal if you dislike a particular lifestyle or method of doing things. You are perfect in yourself.

  15. #15
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    Default Re: Is this normal?

    Not to sound like a smart aleck but its only obvious that people who prefer a quiet life and watch TV should be staying at home and most often prefer to have 1 or 2 company, if at all. I'm not making assumptions on your lifestyle but reflecting on some of my friends who do not "party". I like partying and for parties, the louder, the more people, the better it is but once in a while, I like a quiet evening so the less people, the more intimate it is, and a more relaxing time I can get.

    As someone mentioned before, birds of the same feather flocks together, and I will also point out that its more difficult to hangout with people who prefer alone or with a limited number of friends.

  16. #16
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    Default Re: Is this normal?

    Everyone, thanks again for the support and enlightenment.

    The bottom line is I am no longer as tolerant with liquor as I have been.
    As for friends, I just have to find those who lim kopi or teh liao
    Anyone?

  17. #17

    Default Re: Is this normal?

    Normal or not normal life still have to go on.
    Happy or not happy life still have to go on.
    So you decide lor.
    In chinese said; can Survive for one day then Live one day.

  18. #18
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    Default Re: Is this normal?

    haha, i stopped serious drinking since i was 19
    can have kopi or teh anytime

    but work, I must

  19. #19
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    Default Re: Is this normal?

    Quote Originally Posted by Benign
    I don't like to spend time lurking in nightspots or drinking excessively with peers(even once every blue moon). Now my cycle of friends has dwindled........Some how I just want the 'boring' life that dreaded by the people around me.

    Is having a disciplined lifestyle no longer an acceptable part of socialising in a bustling city? Are karaoke, disco or pubbing till wee hours of the morning the only popular means of wheeling and dealing(buliding contacts) in the business world?

    Sorry I have to ask this, coz I am clueless due to voluntarily jobless for the past three years.

    Any comments are welcome. Thanks
    i dun understand leh, i dun drink, neither do i even entertain those ppl who ask me for a drink then be friends... i wanna drink i drink, i dun wanna drink nobody can force me...

    so u are better off without them...
    Logging Off. "You have 2,631 messages stored, of a total 400 allowed." don't PM me.

  20. #20
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    Default Re: Is this normal?

    Wow! What a Lifestyle! Happy boh..?

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