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Thread: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

  1. #1

    Default OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"



    Stem divorce with polygamy
    Letter from Lim Thiam Poh
    TODAY Newspaper, 3 Sept 2005

    I refer to the viewpoints regarding marriage and divorce discussed at great length recently in Today's Voices section.

    What has been missing in the debate is the age-old concept of polygamy though legally prohibited in our mainstream society still being practised by some minorities which are not constrained under the law.

    In most monogamous unions, adultery is the leading cause of divorce. After all, adultery itself springs from the concept of monogamy.

    Moral and feminist revolutions have over the years pushed polygamy to the brink of almost non-existence.

    Perhaps, it's time we re-introduce the concept of polygamy into modern society as another option in which the needs of men and women are taken care of.

    However, allowing polygamy across all cultural groups does not mean it has to be encouraged just because we allow the use of tobacco doesn't mean we advocate lighting up.

    Many might argue that polygamy serves men's sexual indulgences and justifies extra-marital affairs at work.

    But isn't allowing the existence of brothels for men to openly pay for sexual services equally "evil"?

    Only if our society revisits polygamy in a different and positive light, and embraces the fact that it's men's natural tendency to stray and to have more than one sexual companion, would we be able to progress beyond the status quo and bring down high divorce rates and arrest the spread of sexually-transmitted diseases (contracted at brothels).

    This is not to say that polygamy is everybody's answer to marital woes.

    But issues of jealousy and inequality aside polygamy, unlike divorce, serves to add a new member to the existing family nucleus, not subtract from it. So, it could only do good and not bad.

    At the end of the day, the players involved in a polygamous relationship should feel comfortable with such a union and be willing to make sacrifices to make it work, and to create a supportive, stable and loving family environment to raise well-adjusted children in.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    i think that one "wife" is enuff

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    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    one of the other will get jealous still.

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    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    Quote Originally Posted by itisnottheendorg


    Stem divorce with polygamy
    Letter from Lim Thiam Poh
    TODAY Newspaper, 3 Sept 2005

    I refer to the viewpoints regarding marriage and divorce discussed at great length recently in Today's Voices section.

    What has been missing in the debate is the age-old concept of polygamy — though legally prohibited in our mainstream society — still being practised by some minorities which are not constrained under the law.

    In most monogamous unions, adultery is the leading cause of divorce. After all, adultery itself springs from the concept of monogamy.

    Moral and feminist revolutions have over the years pushed polygamy to the brink of almost non-existence.

    Perhaps, it's time we re-introduce the concept of polygamy into modern society as another option in which the needs of men and women are taken care of.

    However, allowing polygamy across all cultural groups does not mean it has to be encouraged — just because we allow the use of tobacco doesn't mean we advocate lighting up.

    Many might argue that polygamy serves men's sexual indulgences and justifies extra-marital affairs at work.

    But isn't allowing the existence of brothels for men to openly pay for sexual services equally "evil"?

    Only if our society revisits polygamy in a different and positive light, and embraces the fact that it's men's natural tendency to stray and to have more than one sexual companion, would we be able to progress beyond the status quo and bring down high divorce rates and arrest the spread of sexually-transmitted diseases (contracted at brothels).

    This is not to say that polygamy is everybody's answer to marital woes.

    But — issues of jealousy and inequality aside — polygamy, unlike divorce, serves to add a new member to the existing family nucleus, not subtract from it. So, it could only do good and not bad.

    At the end of the day, the players involved in a polygamous relationship should feel comfortable with such a union and be willing to make sacrifices to make it work, and to create a supportive, stable and loving family environment to raise well-adjusted children in.
    Polygamy can also refer to woman having more than one husband right? Unless he can accept another man sharing his wife I think all is empty talk.
    As complexity rises, precise statements lose meaning and meaningful statements lose precision.

  5. #5

    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    Quote Originally Posted by Drudkh
    one of the other will get jealous still.
    yeah think you are right...then no choice loh, tonight i go over the 'other' la. V
    Last edited by itisnottheendorg; 2nd September 2005 at 04:50 PM.

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    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    BUT..............

    If polygamy was reversed.... one woman to many men.... how would that work out... its like those ant colonies... you know... one queen and many drones....



    Hence, before thinking of introducing polygamy with grand dreams of harems and concubines.... think carefully that the opposite can be true too. Esp now when the law does favour the hepless female...

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    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    Polygamy: Having more than one spouse - general term.
    Polygyny: Man married to more than 1 wife.
    Polyandry: Woman married to more than 1 husband.

    From mr Lim's letter it sounded to me like he is advocating more for Polygyny.
    As complexity rises, precise statements lose meaning and meaningful statements lose precision.

  8. #8

    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    It is ridiculous.

    Imagine

    1 husband to many wives
    1 wife to many husbands
    many husbands to many wives

    So where is the family cluster? Will guys be able to accept if their wives sleep with other strangers ? And who will bear the responsibility of the child ? Isn't it equate to visitation to brothels (for per "incident" charges) ?

    Obviously , this will not work in Singapore context.
    Last edited by kitkat; 2nd September 2005 at 04:54 PM.

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    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    1 wife to many husbands -> reduce population (Unless the number of males is xx times more than women)
    many wives to 1 husband -> increase population. (Unless the number of males is xx times more than women)
    -Express yourself not in words-
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  10. #10

    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    Quote Originally Posted by majere2sg
    1 wife to many husbands -> reduce population (Unless the number of males is xx times more than women)
    many wives to 1 husband -> increase population. (Unless the number of males is xx times more than women)

    Gd Point

  11. #11

    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    Quote Originally Posted by kitkat
    Imagine

    1 husband to many wives
    1 wife to many husbands
    many husbands to many wives
    Reminds me of my java programming...

  12. #12

    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    Quote Originally Posted by AReality
    Reminds me of my java programming...
    database relationship ....

  13. #13
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    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    someone should start a "Share your spouse" campaign.

  14. #14

    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    you every new wife you get, you're gonna get a set of accompanying parents-in-law!!!

    that should itself provide a chilling effect...

  15. #15

    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    Quote Originally Posted by nivlekgant
    you every new wife you get, you're gonna get a set of accompanying parents-in-law!!!

    that should itself provide a chilling effect...

    Many wives = many in laws
    Many wives = potentially many step children

    So the wife may come with a package (of many in laws (of husbands too) and many childrens(of other husbands too).

    What a deal ....
    Last edited by kitkat; 2nd September 2005 at 05:08 PM.

  16. #16

    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    Quote Originally Posted by kitkat
    database relationship ....

    So ERD is going to replace family chart?

  17. #17
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    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    Quote Originally Posted by togu
    So ERD is going to replace family chart?
    Don't forget to normalise....
    Don't leave too many orphans too....

  18. #18

    Default Re: OMG..I am been waiting for this to come UP ahem.."Stem divorce with polygamy"

    If it gets too big... become resource hoggers liow

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